Love and Other Words by Christina Lauren Book Review
“‘What’s your favorite word?’
Startled, I looked up at him, unsure I’d heard him right. ‘My favorite word?’
. . . ‘You have seven boxes of books up here. A wild guess tells me you like words.’”
(pg. 39-40)
About
Author: Chrisitna Lauren
Genre: New Adult Contemporary Romance
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Synopsis
Macy Sorensen is settling into an ambitious if emotionally tepid routine: work hard as a new pediatrics resident, plan her wedding to an older, financially secure man, keep her head down and heart tucked away.
But when she runs into Elliot Petropoulos—the first and only love of her life—the careful bubble she’s constructed begins to dissolve. Once upon a time, Elliot was Macy’s entire world—growing from her gangly bookish friend into the man who coaxed her heart open again after the loss of her mother…only to break it on the very night he declared his love for her.
Told in alternating timelines between Then and Now, teenage Elliot and Macy grow from friends to much more—spending weekends and lazy summers together in a house outside of San Francisco devouring books, sharing favorite words, and talking through their growing pains and triumphs. As adults, they have become strangers to one another until their chance reunion. Although their memories are obscured by the agony of what happened that night so many years ago, Elliot will come to understand the truth behind Macy’s decade-long silence, and will have to overcome the past and himself to revive her faith in the possibility of an all-consuming love.
Review
Spoilers Contained Below
To all those young loves and missed chances,
If there’s one phrase I could describe Love and Other Words, it would be: young-love.
The beauty and the heartache of loving someone so young, not really knowing where that love will take you, but if lucky enough, that that loved will last forever.
I have heard nothing but marvelous things about Love and Other Words, and Love and Other Words sure was a marvel of a book. Honestly, Love and Other Words was like the first breath of summer and mingled with the crisp exhale of fall. I loved every second of Love and Other Words in how the story captivating, sweet, and wholesome. What I loved most about Love and Other Words before I get more into the details was how tender and honest the story felt. This story was about young-love that grew apart but found itself years later. However, the then perspectives really felt like I was growing up alongside Macy and Elliot as they navigated their friendship through childhood, the awkward teen years, and becoming young adult. I loved loved loved the sense of realness and maturity between their conversations and experiences because nothing about what I read felt completely fictional in the sense that I could vividly see someone growing up and having these conversations with a guy best friend.
Also, Love and Other Words gave me very big Last Chance Summer vibes by Morgan Matson in the way that the story was heart-achingly beautiful, but still such a perfect summer read. I am also a huge sucker for a then and now perspective because I love reading the history between two people to understand what they have now and why they are fighting for what they have.
I am going to talk about the then perspectives before leading into what happened presently between them, so there’s a nice flow to what I discuss.
Macy was young when her mother passed away. Losing someone you love so young is never easy, like something excavating your heart to the core.The dad losing the one he loved was also devastating, and he didn’t really know how to raise a young girl without his wife, but he darn well tried his best. I loved how the mom left the dad this list of tips for each stage so that he could have some sort of direction of what to do. Part of those tips was that if Macy ever felt overwhelmed coming home, to have take her away to somewhere she could escape. I knew the mom probably meant to go on a mini vacation to take her mind off things, but the dad was so sweet and actually looked into buying a getaway house. They bought a cabin in Healdsburg where Macy had her own room and a secret, magical closet. I have toured houses before and I always wanted one of those closest where it has a secret door to a secret room because I thought that would have been so cool to have my own safe space or getaway if I ever needed one. That’s how I imagined Macy’s secret closet in her cabin room.
That’s where Macy met Elliot—lanky, glasses-wearing Elliot, who was reading a book.
We love a boy who reads a book 👏🏼!!!
But also, like kind of creepy that he was in her closet. I mean, I would have freaked out too and said some threat about my dad being a black belt and a huge Danish guy 😂. However, I loved how their meet-cute was exactly as entitled as they decided right then that they were going to be friends because they both needed friends.
And there was something purely magical about this closet that seemingly brought them together and brought out the best of each other.
I loved how comfortable Macy felt around Elliot. They really could share anything with each other, and I mean anything 😂.
I think part of her comfort talking to Elliot was because he was so new and didn’t know much about her, and I don’ know about you, but when I meet a new person, there’s this sense in me that I can be whoever I want to be—that I can start over. It is much harder to start over with people you grew up with because they know you already or have this idea of who you are in your mind, but when meeting a stranger, you feel like you can start fresh. Macy could start fresh with Elliot because he didn’t know a lot about her, and couldn’t treat her as this fragile bird, waiting to break because her mother passed away. You know that’s hard. I understand that it is uncomfortable to navigate how to talk to someone who lost someone because you want to be respectful and not say the wrong thing, so you skirt about certain conversations, which kind of makes things more awkward. I also understand from Macy’s perspective that she didn’t want people to treat her like she was easily breakable.
“It’s kind of like they all grew up while I put myself back together.”
(pg. 103)
When Macy’s mom was sick, she spent a lot of time with her family, which was understandable. However, that meant she didn’t spend as much time with her friends who were hanging out. This quote jackhammered me in the heart because I felt it. It’s hard when you are going through something that you need to be somewhere else for—mentally and physically—while also knowing that people are having experiences without you. You wish you could have been part of those experiences, but there was something else that was more significant that you had to be there for. When I was going through a rough time when I was younger, I used to say no a lot to my friends who asked me to hang out. I felt like I had to spend as much time with my family before we weren’t a family anymore. So when they were biking around the neighborhood or shopping with each other, I was trying to holding together what was left of something that was breaking. As I got older, they stopped asking me to go places and it felt like they stopped trying because they thought I would say no, when really what I needed now was a friend. But they all grew up without me because I was trying to put myself back together during and after things fell apart. Looking back, it sucks, it sucks so much when I still see my friends who are all grown up because they didn’t have the experiences I did of a hurting family and a broken esteem—the didn’t need to spend their childhood putting themselves together when they had it together.
So they grew up together.
While I had to grow up by myself, and quickly.
So I understood why Macy found it difficult to feel comfortable or accepted by her friends—like that was her real world—when they didn’t truly understand her or what she was going through.
Elliot didn’t treat her like porcelain China, which I appreciated. As later in the book, his honesty was described as “gently relentless,” which was exactly how I thought Elliot was. I loved how he actually let her express how she felt about her mom passing. I mean, his queries might have felt blunt, but sometimes it’s nice to have someone who lets you be honest because they can tell that you don’t know how to talk about something because others haven’t let you talked about it. I felt like he could tell that she kept a lot locked inside and he wanted her to let it out from how losing her mom made her feel or what Christmas without her was like now.
I loved loved loved when he gave her the Bridge to Terabithia book, and how he said, “he could be her May Belle.” 🥺 Elliot always was there for her as the friend she needed when she had nobody who understood or she felt like she could talk to. I mean, there was her dad, but she felt like her dad was processing a lot to, and it was hard for her to talk to him when he hid his emotions well.
They also had really cute emails to each other—because gosh, email back then 😅 haha. I loved their book talk emails. I loved their love of books and words and how words was what connected them—figuratively, verbally, and literally. Their “What’s your favorite word game?” was very sweet as the words they chose seemed to go from the biggest or funniest word they knew to words with weighted meaning, which I love a subtle hint. We cannot forget how they also turned her closet into the most Pinterest-worthy library with the glow in the dark stars on the roof and comfortable seating and blankets everywhere. I mean, genuinely, why would they ever want to leave the confines of her closet when they had books and each other. I don’t know. I would have want to stay in my closet all day too if I were them.
Elliot and Macy had a good thing in this little world they created with each other—the friendship they formed.
But their friendship did feel very bubbled. They both had lives far outside the closet and from where they lived. Healdsburg cabin was Macy’s getaway cabin, not her real life with all her friends and where she went to school. Whereas, Elliots whole life was nearby with his family, friends, and school. They had two very separate lives, and I understood how their relationship would feel weird with how they were everything to each other but had such different lives that they weren’t a part of—-they only had the weekends and breaks to each other, but entirely different universes. They wanted to be part of each other’s universes, but I also understood the awkwardness of mixing up their lives because the other person might feel uncomfortable or they might see the other person in a new way around people who know them differently. However, I could tell how much they both wanted more—time with each other and to be in each others lives–because they were so curious about what their lives were like outside the closet.
But when you have a good thing going–a safe thing going–it’s hard not to want to keep that thing as it is in fear of messing up what you have.
What I loved about the then perspectives was how we saw Elliot and Macy grow up and see how they thought of each other. That’s so wild—to know someone so young and then to grow with them. I have a best friend who I have known since kindergarten. We were five when we met and now we are twenty-three, and we have been through it together from the award stages when our boobs were filling out, when we got our periods, to awful–dreadful–haircuts, to weird boy moments, to first crushes, to dances, and everything in between. It’s wild because I remember like it was yesterday who we were when we met and what we looked like, and to think so much time has passed and for us to look like the women we are today, I don’t know. It’s like how did time go by so quickly for all these big changes that happened gradually. And like I know we changed gradually as one does with puberty 😅, but I saw my best friend practically everyday. I can’t imagine Macy seeing Elliot every weekend or every break and to see the changes in him so starkly because she had time away; almost like when you haven’t seen someone in years and everything that is different about them stands out. When you see someone everyday, the changes are so subtle that they blend together like a watercolor painting left in the rain.
But I loved the little detail of seeing how Macy viewed Elliot growing up. I loved how she saw his lankiness filling out or how he no longer looked like a boy, but had big thighs or hairy legs and that made him masculine. Or I liked how she saw that he had broader shoulders over time or a stronger body look or something 😂. I didn’t grow up with a close guy friend to ever notice those changes so intimately. Don’t get me wrong, I grew up around guys I had known since elementary school and I noticed all these changes too, but it wasn’t so personal as it was for Macy. I was just like, “Oh wow, he’s tall now,” or “Oh, wow, he looks like a man.” You know, teenage observations 😂.
Elliot also noticed changes in Macy.
When Macy had her first period, I loved how the mom had a note for her. Gosh, I loved how the mom spoke about periods being a beautiful thing and part of your body and taking care of her body and not to abuse it. If only, I had that talk about periods and my body 🙃. Insert trauma here. Also, let’s go Elliot for being unwavered and mature when Macy brought up that she just got her period. I liked how he asked her if she felt different or if he could do anything for her 🥺. What a true friend!
Oh, don’t even get me started when they started talking about sex 🙈!!!!
I mean, they were both at an age where being curious about sex was natural and pleasuring yourself was a natural thing. As a woman, no one really ever talked to me about pleasuring yourself because somehow it always felt like something guys would just do. It wasn’t until I was older that I realized that you could pleasure yourself. But I was just thinking as I was reading, how much I loved this honest, yet, awkward conversation between them because they were young and curious. I mean, I was young and curious about a lot of things—and still am—that no one talked to me about or explained. So having someone who was also going through these curiosities must have been really nice to have because they could figure it out together. But can we be quite honest that he was DEFINITELY retrenching her when he was talking about how he touched himself and said he thought of “a particular girl sometimes” 🙈. We know what you meant Elliot. I see you.
They definitely wanted to be more than friends and kept bridging the topic more than once.
“After all, Elliot was just my friend.
My Everyfriend.”
(pg. 173)
Uh huh 😂. Keep deluding yourself that he’s just a friend.
Friends don’t get jealous like that 👏🏼😂!!
When they had that conversation about girls and guys they have been with . . . I was like, “Make him spill the tea, sis!!!!!” They were on Elliot’s roof with Andreas when some girl named Emma stopped by and Macy was upset because it seemed like Elliot and Emma were close. She knew about Emma from the stories Elliot would sometimes tell about his friends at school, and Elliot had one picture of a group of his friends and Emma in his room. Macy was obviously jealous without wanting to say she was jealous of Emma because here was Emma getting to see Elliot everyday, while she only saw him for weeks or days at a time. But the fact that Macy voiced how she had never kissed anyone or been with anyone was so heart-achingly sweet because she loved Elliot and wouldn’t have kissed anyone else because she didn’t want to. Elliot should have felt AWFUL when she said there wasn’t someone else because she obviously was saving her first kiss for him!!! He should have felt like a LOSER 😂. Joking, but I felt awful for Macy because what a dummy. We know he likes her, and he goes kissing not one, but TWO other girls. UGH, JAIL 😂.
I get it. He likes girls. He has needs. He wanted to share la la la la kiss the girl.
But man, TWO?????
And in different bases. He said, I really was reading them books and that dragon porn 🙈. And don’t even get me started on this Emma woman because he went to the prom with her and they had a small thing going where they kissed a couple of times. I mean, what is Macy supposed to think? That you don’t have a thing for this girl Emma? I knew something with Emma was going to come back to bite him in the booty later 😐.
Gosh. But then when he was like, “Kiss me” . . . SCREAMS!!! I was unwell. I love a heated argument to a kiss me moment. But that kiss though!!!! Okay, first kiss. That was more than a first kiss, that was an awakening and a confirmation that they obviously loved each other. Not him saying I kissed other girls because who else am I supposed to kiss—insinuating he wanted to kiss her but because she wasn’t around, he had to kiss other girls. Dummy.
In all seriousness though, such a tender moment of curious young love to go from friends who only read together, to changing into exploring more. I loved such an honest moment together even if their relationship wasn’t really a relationship yet.
They put the OW in SLOW—as in painfully slow 😂.
After their first kiss, things were definitely different between them where they obviously wanted to kiss again or be more than friends, but they were so worried about messing up their friendship because their friendship was everything to them. But you know the saying, “Marry your best friend.” I don’t know, I think that if you have such ease with someone who makes you feel safe, then that’s a good sign that they are the right person, and if you fear losing them, it’s because of how much you truly love them.
“‘You know I compare every boy to you. We aren’t in revelation territory.’
The grin widened. ‘You do?’
‘Of course I do. How could I not? Remember? You’re my best everything.’
‘Your best everything you ask about wanting.’
‘Exactly.’
. . . ‘So maybe your best everything should be your boyfriend.’
I stared at him and he stared at me.
I spoke without thinking. ‘Maybe.’
‘Maybe,’ he agreed in a whisper.”
(pg. 215)
They were just so awkwardly cute and honest. I just really loved how indirect they were about wanting more and their feelings for each other, but so direct about things that would make other people uncomfortable to talk about.
As they got older, they explored more things in that closet 😉. Gosh, if only the dad knew 😂. They had a little spicy moment one time when they were like seventeen now and she made him come with his clothes on and he felt sort of embarrassed about it and had to walk out of the room to do whatever 😅, but I was like, “We need to stop with this whole friendship back and forth thing already because friends don’t do what they just did and have that reaction.” I FREAKING LAUGHED though when they were so much older and bigger than the closet and they did it when the dad was gone, and then the dad came back and checked on them and they acted like they didn’t just have a moment. The dad knew. We all knew the dad knew because they were kids who grew up together, fairly close, then we’re unsupervised and now looked disheveled. Uh huh. They weren’t fooling anyone with what they did. I was honestly more surprised the dad didn’t say anything. I would laughed harder if the dad made it this whole awkward thing and yelled, “I hope you used protection” at them or something 😂. I did love how they finally got together after all these years and wanted to be more because they were at a place where they felt cowmforbtale with the idea. In all honesty, I enjoyed the raw, teenagery way their moment was captured because the rushed feeling of not wanting to be caught is definitely something I feel most teenagers feel when they want to explore sex with someone else. I also liked how gentle and sweet Elliot was to check in with Macy. But it also felt so real in the sense that people build up sex as this big thing, and I do think it’s a huge thing to explore and to talk about, but it’s also very intimate and weird at first—not like this huge fanfare, fantasy movies or shows make it out to be. I mean, maybe that comes later, but I feel like the first time is definitely raw and unfiltered and genuine, if you know what I mean.
I don’t know, it’s kind of crazy how they grew up before my eyes and were even so big they couldn’t fit in the closet—they couldn’t hide their feelings or who they were anymore. So they finally got together as boyfriend and girlfriend for a while.
Then something happened. This myserteous thing that was alluded to the whole book until the very end. The thing that loomed over Macy like a raging storm cloud and that I felt like if this “thing” that didn’t happen was absolutely UNFORGIVABLE, then I would be disappointed 😅. Like imagine going the whole book knowing something happened that caused this eleven year gap and it was only because he kissed Emma or something. Like sis, I get that he kissed another girl you were jealous of, but being angry for ELEVEN YEARS!!!!! That’s a bit much. So I needed this mysterious “thing” to be the wrecking ball of their relationship because I was like, what could have happened that DEMOLISHED something so beautiful and honest between them. Like what?! What happened???????
Because from the minute she saw Elliot in the coffee shop, we all knew she still loved him and he loved her and I had no idea why they wanted eleven years apart if they loved each other sooooooo much.
ELEVEN YEARS.
They could have been married, had kids, bought house in all that time. But no. Eleven years.
Four score and eleven years.
I understand why eleven years now, but still, could have been have been seven years, eight years. Eleven?
Okay.
Macy hadn’t seen Elliot in eleven years since Elliot messed up and broke her heart.
It sounded like that he broke her heart just after they got together because she mentioned how they only grazed the surface of being together before things fell a part. So it would only make sense that things spiraled after getting together. In all that time, they both grew up and led different lives. She noticed how different he looked now—like a man 👏🏼. I loved seeing her reaction after all these years and how she discerned all these features that she saw as a teenager when she thought that Elliot was already a man, but now he was a man man with this chiseled jaw, fine-as-heck hair, hipster glasses and great style. I loved how Christina Lauren included how sure of himself Elliot was now and how he knew how to navigate his body as a man. I think that was such a fine detail to include, but made the story have more of a realness in emphasizing this transition of being a young adult to being a man. I also loved confident Elliot who made heads turn.
But can we just talk about the fact that he found Macy after all these years!!!!!!!!
Like, he knew that she wanted to be in the Los Angeles area, and so he moved to the Los Angeles area after being in New York for sometime because some part of him hoped that he could find her again 🥺💛!!!! If that doesn’t scream I love you and I want to be with you, I don’t know what does.
No man travels to where you are unless he wants to be with you. And no man instantly breaks up with his current girlfriends unless he wants to be with you 😫!!!!!! And he does not clear his schedule at all times just to spend time with you!!!!!!
I just loved the tenacity and drive of Elliot to be so blatantly honest about still loving her but giving her time and space to finally talk about what happened eleven years ago. He tried to call in all that time but she ignored his calls and emails, and they eventually stopped I guess. But man, he really fought for them now and I was here for it.
We love.
Every minute and every interaction between Macy and Elliot was full of love and longing.
I loved the first café get-together where they fell into an easy banter and caught up. I loved how they fell back into the honesty they had when they were younger—being completely open with each other. Tell me why I nearly choked on a sob when Elliot said he was a writer 🥺! I loved that for him—completely on brand. I also loved his pride in Macy for being a pediatric surgeon and that she chased her dream. I also liked how Christina Lauren created some awkward tension because there were so many unspoken things between them and all this time, naturally awkwardness was going to live between them.
There was also the fact that Macy had a fiancé, Sean.
We all know that Sean was an easy scapegoat for Macy to deny her feelings for Elliot. Because if she reeeeeaaaaaallllly loved this Sean guy, then she would not be feeling all these physical and fluttery feelings for Elliot 👏🏼! I don’t think so. If your partner doesn’t make you feel alive, then they are not it, sis.
Like everyone and their mother in this book said, Sean was a convenience. That was genuinely my first impression that Sean was convenient because he had a kid, a nice house she could stay in, and he was financially stable. What was not to like? She could just easily fall into this life with them because it was easier than going after a life that she wanted. Also, Sean was safe. She didn’t need to see him all the time because she worked so much, therefore, there was really nothing to do but just let life happen around her.
But she wasn’t happy and she wasn’t living her life for her. There was no love there, just convenience that they both wanted to feel less alone. I don’t fault anyone for not wanting to be alone, but I do think we shouldn’t settle for anyone just because we feel alone and that’s all we are ever going to feel. I mean, the way that Sean even proposed to her was the least romantic thing I have ever heard 😅. They were doing it and then he rolled over and asked if she was all in and if they wanted to do this, they would do it for her daughter. And then it was like, “Okay, let’s get married” just so the daughter could have a mother-figure, which was admirable. But getting engaged because she didn’t want to hurt his daughter if she left, wasn’t a good reason. And also, Sean was very much into his own daughter than he was into Macy. Sean put so much love and focus on his daughter, that his daughter was the love of his life now—in the way he took care of her. They had their own little bubble that Macy didn’t really need to or feel a part of, that Sean and his daughter were going to be okay if she did leave because it wasn’t like Macy was close to his daughter anyway.
Sean and Macy’s life was just easy.
And easy was okay because easy was safe.
Literally Macy was trying to convince herself to stay with Sean because he’s a good dad and has a nice booty. If you are convincing yourself to stay with someone—grabbing at reasons—then you probably shouldn’t’ stay with that person.
Also, yea, I liked what Sabrina said about how Sean was a good dad. Because Sean was a good dad, but not the best fiancé or choice for Macy. Sabrina was Macy’s best friend since college. They were dorm mates and shared a special bond ever since. Sabrina has always been in Macy’s corner, and Sabrina was subtly vocal about Sean not being the one for Macy.
I loved how honest Sabrina was because sometimes we don’t want to hear things, but they are the truth. Sabrina didn’t trust Macy and Sean’s relationship because they had only been dating a few months and were engaged. She had also only met Sean a handful of times. I wouldn’t have felt good about my friends relationship if I was in Sabrina’s position. Honestly, if your friends are telling you that they don’t like the man you are with, you need to listen to them. Especially if that friend knows you better than you know yourself. I know there are situations where you just have to listen to your heart and to heck with what a friend says or thinks because they don’t know your relationship. But if a friend doesn’t have a good vibe, it’s for a reason.
There was such a distinct difference in the way Sabrina reacted when meeting Elliot versus seeing Sean 😂.
First of all, Sean is soooooo chill it’s bothersome 😂.
If I rode a giraffe in a tutu with a sombrero on my head and a red flag in my hand, dude wouldn’t bat an eye.
He is sooooooo chill about Macy and Elliot’s relationship that no reaction was exasperating as it was disappointing.
Dude needed to gain some testosterone or something and fight for his woman 👏🏼!!!!!!!
I loved how Macy was honest with Sean about meeting with an old friend Elliot and how they used to date and everything. Good for her for not keeping her past a secret from her current partner, but MAN, his non-reaction had me gobsmacked. I wanted rage. I wanted jealously. The fact that he wasn’t jealous or bothered, felt like he didn’t really care enough about her to feel threatened that he could lose her.
You know?
I mean, if this were a different situation, I do like if a guy is secure in his relationship to not go all macho-territorial with the whole jealously act. But I didn’t like how he didn’t sound the tinniest bit apprehensive of Macy speaking to an ex. Zero-reaction. He needed to give something, anything really. But he didn’t. like he didn’t care.
When they went to the picnic where Macy invited all her old friends and Elliot, I was soooooo discombobulated that he was sooooo focused on his daughter and didn’t seem to talk to anyone, and if he did talk to someone it was a monosyllabic response before going back to his phone. I’m a shy person, very introverted, but even I have the social grace to know not to be on my phone at social events and to at least try to make conversation even if I am highly nervous to do so!!!! Sean needed to put that phone down and at least try to get to know Macy’s friends because if he really loved Macy, he would want to be part of her world. But noooooooo. Dude, loved his phone 😑. And not Sabrina’s husband literally dreading talking to Sean because he’s dull as a rock 😂. I freaking CRACKED UP when Macy went to wait with Sabrina and her other friends Nikki and Dave, and Sabrina’s husband was like “Sean is seriously the most boring.” Sorry, Sean. Not a fan.
I loved loved loved how Sabrina, Nikki, Dave, and Macy all greeted Elliot with huge grins like they were so ecstatic that he was there—like he was a walking rainbow. I loved how I could tell Sabrina instantly loved Elliot by a thousandfold by the way Elliot engulfed her in a hug and how affable he was with everyone. I freaking laughed with how Dave looked at Macy and Elliot didn’t understand how they were not dating or a thing because of the way they obviously looked at each other. I felt the same way, bro. Elliot actually tried to talk to Macy’s friends and be part of Macy’s life, which was so sweet. He also knew about these people from before, so it must have been surreal to finally put faces to names even if those faces changed in the span of eleven years.
Elliot and Macy’s banter though was everything.
“‘We’ve never really been good at lying to each other. When I was fifteen, Macy told me to change my deodorant. She hinted that the only one might not be working anymore.’
‘Elliot pointed out the specific day he noticed I was getting boobs.’
Sabrina stared at us.”
(pg. 179-180)
They had so much humor, love, and history and it was clear as day what they shared.
Macy was her full self—living—with Elliot.
If I noticed this enlivened, effervescent side of my friend, I would know in my heart that this person was the one for my friend.
I loved loved loved the Macy and Sabrina heart-to-heart after the picnic.
“‘When Elliot walked up to us . . . I swear that was the first time I’d seen you smile like that–with your entire body–and it made me question everything about your personality before then.’
‘Wow,’ I say slowly. That feels . . . enormous.
‘You think you’re happy, but you’re barely living.'”
(pg. 119)
Sabrina mentioned more about Macy’s past than we knew at that point. Sabrina was there for what happened after the mysterious thing with Elliot that broke her heart—she saw Macy at her lowest. But no matter how low Macy felt, Elliot was this constant presence in her life that Macy talked about or felt around her. I teared up with how after Macy tired to date and get with another guy, she threw up and broke down about Elliot. If she didn’t still feel something for Elliot, she wouldn’t have sobbed so hard or felt like she was betraying him in that moment. I know Elliot was her first everything and moving forward was going to be difficult and painful, but her emotions were tenfold because she still loved him.
“‘You only have a handful of people you’d actually call friends, and keep everyone else on the surface.'”
(pg. 221)
Elliot was the only one she felt comfortable opening up to. And she didn’t have him anymore.
Macy just didn’t want to hurt again the way Elliot hurt her. When I was reading this part, I still didn’t know what hurt her, but again, I had to assume what Eliot did was gosh-darn awful to ruin her so much that she didn’t want to let other people in.
But when you love someone so much, you also find room to forgive them.
I was like thank GOSH when she finally wake up and stopped deluding herself to loving her fiancé. She finally noticed that she let herself become so comfortable in this routine with Sean that she wasn’t happy and wasn’t living.
“‘Was it such a relief to have something sorted, to not feel anything—not guilt or love or fear or uncertainty–that I just let the routine become my future?”
(pg. 202)
You know, I don’t blame her either because all she did was work and then go home, which left barely any space for her to care for Sean—his home and his life was a stopping ground, but that didn’t mean she had to stop there in terms of what she wanted.
Also, major red flag that Sean still wasn’t bothered when he knew there was something between Macy and Elliot. I mean, c’mon!!!! Elliot already was declaring how much he loved her after all these years and then he basically asked her out after the picnic and Sean acted like what was happening was totally normal—-the epitome of unfazed. Macy slept on the couch for weeks because she was fed up with Sean not feeling anything real for her or even reacting to how she might feel for Elliot. He just told her to figure out how she felt like he didn’t care if she chose him or not 😑. Like what? What an idiot. They truly were doing a dance around each other until they ultimately broke up because why keep up this thing anymore. I did like how they ended on amicable terms, but how sad that she spent all this time with a man, heck, potentially going to marry a man, who didn’t really love her but was more inspired by her. They were both hurting when they met each other—Macy from her past and Sean with Ashely who left them. Like called to like and they were happy to live in this peaceful bubble even what they shared wasn’t real.
There was something Elliot mentioned later on that I didn’t really consider until he mentioned it—how Macy probably stayed for Phoebe (Sean’s daughter whose name I’m just now remembering) because Phoebe didn’t have a mother figure and she didn’t want Phoebe to grow up without a mother 🥺, For someone who just literally entered her life again, he was highly attuned to her still to have figured out why she might have been staying with Sean. Macy wanted to make sure Phoebe would be okay because she didn’t have a mother anymore, which was sweet. Once Macy saw how solid Sean and Phoebe were, that fear that Phoebe would hurt or miss out on a mother, didn’t feel as bad. Phoebe would be okay.
When leaving the picnic, Elliot asked Macy if she would go with him to Andreas’s wedding with him. Just one weekend. As friends. I really wanted her to take the leap and go with him. No one texts a guy as much as she did or feel the way her heart felt if she wasn’t interested. So after calling things off with Sean, there was a high possibility of Elliot and Macy getting back together. I loved that for her if she allowed herself to open up about what happened that night.
“Eleven years later, and [Elliot] still aches for what we had.”
(pg. 205)
Before Andreas wedding, they had a little Thanksgiving moment, which I thought was absolutely awkward.
I mean, for someone as smart as Elliot to invite his recent ex-girlfriend and the girl he loved his whole life to the same dinner was D-U-M-B DUMB 😂. I’m sorry, how did he think that situation would end well??????
Also, I either give Rachel credit for trying to be civil by being there when she knew Macy was going to be there or I think she’s incredibly dumb for the same reason. Either way, I felt the two people who loved him were not going to be a good mix in the same room. Elliot obviously wanted Macy there more than Rachel because he didn’t care when Rachel walked out in anger 😅. Sorry Rachel. But I also felt bad for Rachel because she must hav known that Elliot still loved Macy all this time because she mentioned it and Elliot mentioned how he could never love someone the way he still loved Macy. So truly, Rachel was just caught in the middle of an uncomfortable and unfortunate circumstance. But I wanted Rachel to spill the tea before she walked out that door!!!!!!!!! How did Macy hurt Elliot all these years? What did Rachel mean that Elliot was her business for five years, but really for one??? Don’t be cryptic now!!!!! Because was it Macy who hurt Elliot or the other way around?
Honestly, the probably both hurt each other because they loved each other and felt hurt by whatever happened.
They truthfully should have had this conversation much sooner than eleven years later. This conversation should have been the first thing out of their mouths when seeing each other after all these years, not happening the day of Andreas’s wedding.
I thought it was heartbreakingly sweet when Macy reunited with Elliot’s family 💛. Elliot’s family always treated her like family—they were her family—and they missed her so much. I loved how much the mom cried and how Alex was all grown up and was like, “Do you remember me?” like she missed Macy so much even though she probably was too young to fully know Macy. But I loved how Alex gravitated towards Macy like she just knew her deep in her bones. I also loved how Elliot’s family felt so natural around Macy to be their wild, chaotic selves and how that felt like coming home to Macy 🥺.
They really did want to talk about what happened in the garden after nearly ravishing each other in a heated frenzy.
Sigh.
The first part of what happened eleven years ago was a given 😂. I just didn’t know to what extent.
Long story short, Elliot “slept” with Emma and Macy caught Elliot naked on a bed with Emma draped over his body like they had just had sex. Can I just say that Elliot’s “friends” absolutely stuck and that he needs better friends who don’t let him get drunk off his butt and do stupid things, yet alone rat him out to his girlfriend for the stupid things he was doing. Honestly, what LOSER friends he had, if they could be called friends. Elliot got drunk at his friend Christin’s New Years Eve party, and he called Macy in this really weird, inebriated state saying how much he loved her and then he proposed. Not me literally finishing Queen Charolette: A Bridgerton Story and hearing the whole, “Do you love me?” monologue in my head when Elliot was like, “Do you love me?” 🙈
Forever ruined by Bridgerton 🙃.
But no, in all seriousness, I was like, no sis, you are not taking his proposal seriously because he is DRUNK. I know he loves you and you love each other, but he is not thinking clearly.
Which brings me to the fact that his friends knew he was drunk and then slept with Emma when he thought he was sleeping with Macy because he was THAT drunk????? In seriousness, that does not sit right with me because that sounds like nonconsensual intercourse. He was drunk and revealed later that he thought he was doing it with Macy, so if Emma knew he was drunk, she took advantage of Elliot by sleeping with him. That’s a whole other conversation to have, and the fact, the FACT that his friends knew that too. I don’t know. The whole situation that happened on New Years was wrong in so many ways.
From Macy’s perspective, I understood how hurt she was because Elliot sleeping with Emma, heck, just being near Emma was her worst fears come to fruition because Emma was a big point of insecurity in their relationship—thus the ultimate betrayal.
I don’t blame Macy for not saying anything because she was processing all this new information that Elliot didn’t really sleep with Emma and that he thought it was her. I don’t see how him thinking he slept with her that night was better? you know? I just felt like his revelation was this whole other thing that he needed to talk to someone about because he was taken advantage of when he was drunk, and that’s absolutely not okay. That’s something he should have talked to Emma about and his family or done something about how what happened was nonconsensual. Again, just such a wrongness.
I also thought for someone who had eleven years to plan this conversation in his head, I thought he would have a better speech 😅. I liked his honesty of his perspective, but dude, we had eleven years to really say your part. The saddest part was how the light seemed to go off in Elliot when Macy didn’t react.
An Elliot who gave up was the most devastating Elliot ever 🙁.
I understood where he was coming from though. He literally flew to find her, broke up with his girlfriend, and did everything he could to be part of Macy’s life again. Then he finally got his chance to have this eleven-years-too-late conversation only to feel defeated that Macy would never forgive him. He was frustrated because he had been fighting and pinning for her and she was giving him nothing. Bitter Elliot who basically asked Macy to get the f*** out of this place was so sad to see; it’s sad to see someone you love, lose a little bit of love for you.
The second part of what happened eleven years ago SHATTERED my heart for Macy 😭.
I didn’t know.
I had hunch or an idea. Macy said he dad passed away, which I thought nothing of at first because of life. Then I noticed how Macy didn’t go in cars or didn’t drive; she always rode the bus. And that seemed like something Sabrina never pushed Macy about, which meant Sabrina knew why Macy only rode the bus, which made me think that the dad was in a car accident all those years ago????
When Macy went to the cabin after all these years and started talking to her dad 😭—full body sobs.
Eleven years made sense now 😭.
The dad knew something was going on between Macy and Elliot all those years ago. Before driving to Christin’s house on New Years Eve, Macy talked to her dad who told her that it was okay to drive to Elliot because he could tell that Macy would be bothered unless she checked on him. But one of his conditions was that he called him when she got to Healdsburg. But with everything going on, she forgot to call her dad. I had a feeling the dad was going to drive and check up on her because any dad worried about his daughter would go out of his way to make sure she was okay. The dad found Macy in her closet, crying. When driving back from Healdsburg the next day, the dad kept looking at Macy because he wanted to ensure she was okay, which was incredibly sweet. He was really worried about his little girl and probably thinking about all the ways he was going to pummel Elliot for breaking his little girl’s heart. Because his focus was on his daughter, his eyes were not on the road. A car swerved into them and the dad passed away. Macy was relatively okay, but she lost her dad—the one person left in her immediate family. She was not okay.
I sobbed when Macy was just numb and the police officer held her, saying her understood her loss and pain. She was just betrayed and now lost her dad???? That’s awful. I wanted to hug her for all the pain she felt, all the loss.
After she lost her dad, Macy fell into an abyss where she could barely finish school, not quite knowing how she did it either. She was numb to everything and everyone around her. She lived with relatives in a new place for a while and they supported her all they could because of the amount of sheer lost she endured all these years and now. When she got to college, the school selected Sabrina as her roommate because Sabrina had experienced a similar loss with her brother the year before. The school wanted to make sure Macy was not alone and would be okay with someone who understood her. In all this grief and sorrow, Macy wanted to tell Elliot what happened to her dad. She also wanted his comfort because he was still the one person she could be honest and open with, and even if he did betray her, she loved him. I really felt for Macy.
She could take all the time she needed to heal and process because what she went through, no one should go through. Let alone alone.
“‘I wasn’t thinking very clearly–after–I wasn’t able to separate you. And it.'”
(pg. 388)
I also don’t fault Macy for not mingling her emotions with what happened.
She was angry at Elliot, and it was hard not to feel mad that if he hadn’t betrayed her, then none of this would have happened—her dad would still be there. I know she didn’t blame Elliot for what happened, but I could understand how her feelings would blur together when she didn’t feel anything but empty. Also, her life dominoed so hollowly that when she fell, she just stayed down because there was no reason anymore to get back up.
When Elliot found her in the cabin after basically telling her to get the heck out, he was so gentle and tender with her because he probably felt guilty for how he acted. But also he must have saw what I felt, just pure regret and sorrow radiating off her when she was talking to her dad. Elliot learning what really happened eleven years ago must have felt like losing her father all over again. When Elliot threw up, I wanted to hug him because I felt like he was blaming himself for what happened that day that he felt physically sick to his stomach. He shouldn’t blame himself for what happened because it wasn’t his fault. Sure, the events of that day don’t mix well for what did happen, but what happened wasn’t on Elliot.
I love the calm quiet after everything was laid out into the open. I loved how they were older now, but still in the same closet after all this time. The moment and place felt fitting for them. They were really going to try be together this time, which I felt was about time after all they had been through and have not been through. I liked the idea of them wanting to be more than just friends in a closet—to take their relationship in the real world because they had grown up, grown past the safety of this world they created together.
Letting go of two houses that held such meaning to her, must have been like ripping out her heart. One house held her mom’s memory and the other, her father’s. Macy was trying to hold onto them as long as she could. She was also terrified to revisit the places they lived because they would bring back all these bittersweet moments that she couldn’t have again. But there’s also something to be said about a house you grew up in. It’s where you have many firsts and many beautiful and devastating moments in one place that you call home. To give that up or to sell that, feels like you are giving up on those memories and that place that was so special. It also feels wrong to sell something so personal and that held so much meaning, like those memories or moments don’t exist without the place. But those memories do. They live on with us.
I was proud of Macy letting go of both houses—to move forward into her new life with all the love around her and that will support her. I also loved the possibility that these houses could be a place where other people could enjoy like maybe two other kids who fall in love over words in a magical closet. Elliot being there to go through the memories with her was just perfect.
The ending was sweet with Elliot and Macy moving in together and the whole Petropoulos family was there to help them. I loved how they made Macy fit right in—like she never truly left their lives.
“‘Favorite word?’ he whispers.
I don’t even hesitate. ‘You.'”
(pg. 403)
I knew that the last favorite word had to be either love or you because I am too much of a romantic to think otherwise 😂. But I loved that—that they still had this love between them after all these years and that they FINALLY found healing and connection with each other.
Love and Other Words was every bit of tender-hearted, sweet, and beautiful as the words contained within this book. I loved Elliot’s tenacity with fighting for the love he felt and how he was so steadfast in his feelings. I also liked how we saw Macy kind of grow up and come alive again with Elliot in her life again. She was just going through the motions, but had light in her eyes and a flutter in her stomach every time Elliot was near. And if that’s not love, I don’t know what is.
I think I would have liked to know more about what else was on Macy’s moms list because Macy’s mom sounded like a fun, vibrant character. I would have loved some awkward moments between Elliot and Macy’s dad to see what he would have said about Elliot being with Macy back then. But I bet he would be happy for Macy and Elliot now because they obviously bring each other joy and he wouldn’t want less for his daughter. I do think that somewhere in these eleven years, they truly could have reached out sooner, but I understand that people need time to heal and process.
Overall, I truly enjoyed myself and such beautiful writing and story-telling 💛.
What was your favorite part of the book? Least favorite part? What did you think of the book?
What is your favorite word?
I quite like the word platitude because it sounds like platypus and I am a child 😂. Joking. But platitude is a cool word to spell and say. Also, platitude rhymes with gratitude 😂. I’m done.
Let me know below in the comments as I love hearing from you all 💕
I hope you have a beautiful day whenever and wherever you might be reading this 😊.
And as always, with love,
Rating
5 Full Bloom Flowers
Characters: I think you might just fall in love with Macy and Elliot as much as I did.
Plot: I love love love friends-to-lovers and this was exactly what I mean by that.
Writing: I loved the then and now perspective in getting to know Macy and Elliot’s history. The writing was also done so beautifully and seamlessly to tell a heart-aching but poignant story. Also, I loved the raw honesty of feeling all the things that Macy and Elliot did while growing up.
Romance: Soooooo where is my best friend who loves to read that I can fall in love with? 🙈