Nick and Noel’s Christmas Playlist by Codi Hall Book Review

“Nick pressed his forehead to hers, his arms secured around her waist. ‘That’s what friends with an interest in becoming more do for each other.’

She chuckled. ‘It definitely scores you brownie points.'”

(pg. 279)

About

Author: Codi Hall

Genre: New Adult Contemporary Romance

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Synopsis

Nick Winter is just out of the military, and his Christmas homecoming is not going as planned. What was supposed to be a memorable holiday with his long-time girlfriend goes sour when he learns she cheated on him while he was stationed overseas. At least Nick can rely on his usual shift at the family Christmas tree farm with his best friend, Noel Carter, and her endless supply of Christmas tunes to lift his spirits. A night of fun together is just what he needs to forget about his ex.

But then they kiss. And it feels…so right.

If Noel can turn Nick’s Blue Christmas merry and bright, this might be the last Christmas Nick spends with a broken heart. This year, they’ll be Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree as a couple―as long as Nick’s ex doesn’t go standing under any mistletoe.

Review

Spoilers Contained Below

To the holiday songs we know and love,

You know what’s better than a holiday read? A holiday read with a dog on the front cover 😅?

I think publishers are getting smart because I’ve been seeing more dogs on the cover, and I’m here for it. I would have loved more Butch, the dog throughout the book because if the dog made it to the cover, I’m expecting quality dog content. Not much dog content, but definitely a hopeful, healing, and romantic holiday read ♥️.

I loved Nick. What a great guy. I love a romantic.

He just had the biggest heart and it showed in everything he did or how he treated others. He helped people without asking, lended a hand, and he had such an open heart. I also would like to thank him and Noel for their service. Nick just came back from being discharged to where he was, and he was going to now focus on being home and starting a life for himself. He thought he was coming home to his best friend, family, and girl-friend of eight years. He thought he was going to propose to said girl-friend, Amber, when really she broke things off with him. I could understand why Amber would break up with Nick. They didn’t really form a relationship even if they had dated a long time because he was serving his country. He was barely home to get to know her or provide the love or attention she needed. That’s not to blame Nick at all because Amber knew he was going to serve in the military and she still decided to date him. I don’t know what it’s like to be the partner of someone who is serving in the military, but I can imagine it is absolutely difficult because you worry and miss the person. In Nick and Amber’s situation, knowing Amber, she probably needed someone who was there and could show her he loved her. But Nick was always away.

When he came back, it was natural she broke-up with him because she wanted something different and she changed. Nick also changed in that time. He really should have looked at the break-up as a good sign because maybe it was a fresh start and just what he needed. Also, he really dodged a basketball to the head by not being with Amber 🤪. All’s well that ends well. Also, I must say, if his friends and family had a bad feeling and detested Amber’s guts, that should be a big sign. I think if a family or friends both have a bad opinion of a partner, they probably know you best and know that person is not right for you. Or they know that person doesn’t have good intentions or something’s up. The sisters hated Amber, Noel hated Amber, Anthony hated Amber, Pike hated Amber. Only Nick liked her until he realized he had his head up his butt to realize how mean Amber actually was.

The only reason Nick went out with Amber was her big boobs and body, as everyone teases him about. But deep down, we all knew he really liked his best friend, Noel. They were at a campfire once and Nick and Noel were having this special moment, but it got interpreted by something and Noel had to walk off, so Amber sat by Nick. Nick fell for Amber that night instead of the person he really loved, Noel. That broke my heart because if Noel hadn’t walked off to who knows where, they could have started something sooner. But maybe it wasn’t the time.

They were best friends.

When they kissed to make their exes or ex-hook ups jealous, I was like, “This is not going to end well.”

They couldn’t just fake kiss and assume that the other person wasn’t going to feel something about it. Also, the whole fake dating thing? We all knew they would eventually want to real date or something because they both liked each other without really admitting it. Or they did admit it, but they were scared to admit it or act on it.

I think Nick was terrified to act on his emotions because he didn’t want to ruin the good relationship he had with Noel. He also just went through a break-up so I wasn’t sure at first if he liked Noel or if he was just really horny and was looking for a way to distract his fresh break-up emotions. Either way, he didn’t want things to change too soon or fast, knowing Noel.

Noel was scared to admit that she had feelings for Nick because she also didn’t want to ruin their friendship and potentially lose the Winterses as family. She also didn’t do commitment.

“Noel, on the other hand, had enough hang-ups to be a coat rack. Self-esteem issues, emotional issues, attachment issues. commitment issues.

(pg. 162)

Noel, Noel, Noel.

You know the psychoanalysis is coming if I say someone’s name three times 😂.

At least she was self-aware. Not to say that she was broken or unlovable or that she was actually any of the things she listed herself as, but she did have many things to work through. I guess, what I’m trying to say is that I feel like if we label ourselves with all these issues, we believe them so much and that we can’t be otherwise. I think Noel heavily labeled herself as having self-esteem issues, emotional issues, attachment issues, and commitment issues because that for a long time, it prevented her from getting through these issues—-like she was stuck with it because that’s just who she was.

When Noel was in high school, she lost both of her parents when they were on their way to the Mistletoe Christmas Concert, a concert they hosted every year. Her parents loved music and so did Noel. After her parents suddenly passed away, the Mistletoe Christmas Concert wasn’t really Noel’s scene, and she didn’t like to go because she connects the event to something that took her parents away from her. I could understand how she felt this way, and I would feel the same way. It probably was also difficult to go to an event that honored her parents when it was painful for Noel to talk about or look at her parents because of how much she missed them.

Grief is different for anyone, and I just wanted to hug Noel because losing someone is not easy. It’s one of the most painful things to do, and to lose both her parents so young. Of course, such a life-altering event would change her. That’s hard. It sucks. Noel lost her parents a few years ago before this book took place, but Noel was still processing her grief. There is no timeline for grief, you know. You can process however long you need to to heal and find peace. I felt like it was harder for Noel to find peace because she never talked about her parents, and not talking about something, bottles it up. It stays there, so her pain was still there. Noel also didn’t look at the memories or photos of her parents, which I could understand. After I lost my two grandma’s, it was extremely hard to look at photos or have things that were theirs because it felt wrong and weird. I did think that Noel needed to look through her parent’s things eventually because she couldn’t move on if she didn’t remember. Part of moving on is remembering—it’s carrying what we remember with us and sharing it with others to keep the memory alive. I felt that her parent’s things being in a storage unit was a good metaphor for how Noel boxed up her emotions and her past without confronting it.

So, that’s something we were definitely going to go through with Noel.

The lack of personality and her home reflected that barren, desolate feeling I got from Noel. If I’m being honest, it was hard to read Noel’s point of view because she was hard on herself and I could feel her pain like it was my own. She was hurting so much, and it made me sad that everyone could see it and feel it, but they didn’t want to push her too much because she had been through a lot already. They shouldn’t push her, rightfully so, but I felt like they wanted to help her in whatever ways they could because they loved her and wanted her to be happy.

Part of the people who loved her was her best friend’s family.

I think life gifts us just the right people. Noel was gifted the Winter’s who accepted Noel into their home after her parents passed. That’s true friendship and love right there. I loved how accepting Victoria (Nick’s mom) and Mac (Nick’s dad) were of Noel, even when she was older now and had her own apartment. It was just so wholesome to see them hug and kiss her like she was their own daughter. But I could understand why Noel would feel uncomfortable by their affection—they weren’t her parents, but deep down they probably felt like it. She probably didn’t want anyone to replace them because no one could, but I do think Victoria and Mac cared for her well and were great figures for her to go to. I could also feel how awkward Noel felt going to the Winter’s house now that she was older. She felt out of place, but they always wanted her there, heck they wanted her there more. They were just so welcoming because Noel was part of the family, but again, I felt Noel didn’t want to intrude or step on their toes. I could also understand that because whenever I go over to a friend’s house or something and they cook dinner and all these things, I feel so weird because I want to do something to help or I feel bad that I didn’t do enough or bring something else. But one thing I learned is that people who are hosting something, most of the time, are thinking about if everyone is having a good time or what they could do to be more welcoming. Oftentimes, guests are thinking about how they don’t belong or they are intruding or they aren’t doing enough. Both want to please and don’t want to displease, and it’s such an interesting dynamic because the other person isn’t thinking what the other person is thinking at all. But I get it.

There was this moment where Victoria baked Noel these lemon shortbread cookies that were Noel’s mom’s old recipe. I wanted to hug Noel because I know exactly how it feels to have a food or object remind you so closely of someone you loved and lost. It was at that moment, I felt Noel’s pain and grief as so raw because the cookies made her happy because they reminded her of her mom’s. But thinking about her mom brought her immense pain because she loved her mom and now her mom was not there. The mom could not make her cookies like Victoria attempted, and that was just a reminder of what she lost. I know Victoria didn’t mean to trigger or hurt Noel. I also know Victoria wasn’t trying to replace the mom. It was just really hard for Noel to remember the happy moments when all she felt was this sorrow 😢.

I also loved how Victoria would cook all these grand meals for Noel because she noticed Noel not eating enough or taking care of herself. Noel was a nurse, which made me wonder if she liked being a nurse because she could save people when you know . . . But I liked that she was a nurse, but being a nurse is no walk in the park. Victoria also looked out for Noel’s well-being like no other. She opened conversations or tried to open conversations with Noel about how she felt. I thought Victoria was a bit pushy with getting Noel to sing at the Mistletoe Concert because I could tell how much Noel didn’t want to, but she also didn’t want to disappoint Victoria. Noel should be able to open up when she wants to. Victoria also talked to Nick about not hurting Noel because Victoria wasn’t dumb and didn’t see the way Noel carried her grief on her shoulders. I loved that there were these subtle conversations because it highlighted her motherliness.

I also really really loved—adored—Nick’s sisters ♥️. I have never read many YA or NA romance books with strong or endearing sister-brother relationships, and Codi Hall really played Nick, Holly, and Merry’s relationship so well. I loved how they would tease Nick about liking Noel and acting on his crush. I also loved how they meddled. We loved meddling sisters. I also loved how they were meddling sisters to Noel as well. They were just too much fun. It was funny whenever they were in the room, and Nick and Noel were there, they would band together and make jokes about how much sexual tension Nick and Noel had. I also laughed when Merry and Holly walked in on Nick and Noel having an intense make out session in the grade and they were like, oops, sorry we interrupted or something like that. They should have played up the embarrassment for Nick and Noel 😂.

I loved that Codi Hall gave Merry and Holly personalities. That sounds weird writing it, but sometimes in books, siblings are just these side characters we know by name, but don’t know. But with Merry and Holly, I felt like I knew who they were. Merry was hilarious, head-strong, and fierce. She’s not afraid to state her mind or make a joke.

“Of for the love of Target, never mind! Pop culture is lost on you, my friend!” Merry shook her head. “All I’m trying to say is she’ll show up with some big romantic gesture you won’t understand but still love. You’ll kiss, fall into each other’s arms and live happily ever after.”

“You do understand what reality is, right?

“Reality TV, yeah. For sure.”

(pg. 341)

Holly was also a joy to read and know. She was the opposite of Merry in having a more quiet demeanor and she seemed more gentle. But she was every bit determined, caring, and hard-working. I thought it was pretty kick butt that Holly had a booming local business with her store A Shop For All Seasons. She sounded very business savvy by knowing what activities she could include in her store—holiday DIY class, wine tasting, food—to get people to buy or enjoy her store. I also liked how her shop was versatile for all seasons because if she stuck to one season, I don’t think her business would work year round, so good for her. I think the next book might be about Holly because she seemed like she got an enemies to lovers thing going on with this grinch fo a guy, Declan 😏. He seemed like a butt for how he complained to Holly about her holiday music. Holiday music might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but she was just enjoying the season, buddy. But I think there can be a good story there.

The sisters were stellar and I’m hopeful the rest of the series features them.

I also loved how when Noel needed help making Gabby’s wedding favors after they were ruined, his sisters and parents were down to help Noel—-no questions asked. I loved that ♥️. I loved how Merry and Holly helped and then the mom and dad were already at the table, ready to help. They helped Noel because they loved her, and you help family in their times of need.

“They know you love them and that is why we’ll never give up on you. They’re your family, Noel. I’m your family. Even if we didn’t work out, none of us will shut you out, no matter how much distance you try to put between us.”

(pg. 236)

I loved that though, because that’s a valid fear—that if she and Nick tried to date and they broke up, she could lose the Winter’s as a family because of the awkwardness. But I knew too, that they wouldn’t let her leave the family they built over a break-up. They love her too much to do that.

I thought it was super cute how they took a Christmas card picture every year as a family. I loved how they never excluded Noel because she was family even if she didn’t want to feel like she was. It was funny how many times they had to take the photos. Isn’t that every holiday picture 😂?

Noel had all these people in her life who loved her and who she loved, but she couldn’t bring herself to accept their love as much as she wanted. She was holding back because she knew what it was like to lose people so quickly and then to hurt. She didn’t want to lose anyone else in her life to feel that much pain again.

“I don’t know how to explain it. Losing my parents, I’m prepared for loss but I don’t want to take on anyone else. I don’t want my feelings for anyone to grow. And then when they’re gone, I have another hole in my heart. . . besides, many people go through life without love.”

(pg. 138-9)

It didn’t take that long for me to know that the pain of losing others was what made Noel closed to love.

And I get it.

It’s not easy to lose anyone because it’s like standing in the middle of a fire willingly.

But love comes with loss.

A life well lived is a life well loved, as they say. It hurts because you loved them. And that feeling is going to hurt like standing in the middle of an inferno, but that pain you feel for some time, shouldn’t be enough to close the doors to love forever. It broke my heart that Noel wanted to be alone, and there’s nothing wrong with being alone. But if she meant being completely alone with no family or friends because she pushed everyone away? Now that broke my heart 😢.

Also, we can’t control who we love or lose. But we can control how we carry on and how we carry them with us. Her parents’ love was inside her, and I think it was untouched for so long. pushed down with all these other emotions she bottled up, that she couldn’t see or feel the love and joy she still had within her. But it is extremely hard to open up again or want to love again when you know so much pain of losing someone. No one wants to feel pain. But we do. It comes with love.

Noel pushed everyone away for a long time because she didn’t want to be close to anyone to feel love because she didn’t want to hurt anymore, but she was actually hurting herself even more. She was also hurting those around her who wanted to love her.

“The last few years, she’d made excuses for not spending time with people she loved, like being busy with school and then work, but the truth was, maybe she’d been distancing herself as a defense mechanism.”

(pg. 256)

She was self-aware.

I get it though.

I did the same when I went through rough moments in my life and I didn’t know how to process it and I thought no one would understand how I felt. I pushed people away and said I was busy with school, but I just didn’t know how to open up about what I was feeling. For Noel, she didn’t go around to the Winter’s or talk about her parents because she didn’t want to get close to them because if she lost them—other people in her life—it would break her completely. And I understood that 😢. Her feeling all that pain would be like walking on a broken leg.

For all these reasons, she didn’t want to get married—-find the “one”— or have kids.

She would have all these flings because it meant nothing to her, when deep down she knew she wanted more than a hook up with some douche. Tripp was a real Tripp or should I say real di** because what a loser. First, how sleazy was he to be sleeping with Noel and someone else and not even tell Noel. That’s disgusting. He should have had at least the common decency to tell Noel that he was sleeping with another woman. Second, I can’t believe that he would take her out and then ask her for money for some beer company. As Chelsey Jade Curtis from the What We Said podcast would say, “If men have anything, it’s the AUDACITY.” I mean, the AUDACITY. Was he serious? He wanted to talk to her about lending him her parent’s money for a beer company that he doesn’t know how to run nor knows how to run a company because his last few companies were complete failures or he got bored of them????? Yea, sure, Noel was going to lend the guy who lied to her her parent’s money 🙃??? Loser.

And the AUDACITY for him to get mad and then rage at her door about being a b**** or something because she didn’t want to lend him the money. Funny how when guys don’t get what they want and they get all angry, all of a sudden a woman’s b**** , she says sarcastically. Honestly, I’m tired of people thinking that women are b****** or sl*** or any other demeaning derogatives just because they are being big babies. Tripp needed to get his trust-fund baby. butt out of there. She owed him nothing. Nada. Zero. I’m happy she took her food to go because she said, “he promised me a meal.” Good for her 👏🏼. Also, good for her for sneaking out the bathroom. I would have done the same thing.

Tripp also gave macho vibes, or shall I say macho LoSeR vibes ✌🏼.

Good for him when Pike ran his butt over and tackled him. We loved to see it. That loser needed to go. The AUDACITY and creepiness that he touched Noel at the end because he still wanted money from her, and then he didn’t let go. I was like, “Bro, better let go or I’m about to scream.” I cackled because Pike was just waiting for a moment to kick this guy’s butt. I loved how Pike defended her honor, but it’s not like she needed a guy to save her you know. She was a strong woman, it’s just we lived in a messed up world where men take advantage of women and make it hard for them to feel comfortable doing something as basic as walking down a street. That’s a whole other heated conversation I can get into as a woman, but this is not the blog post to rant about it.

But while I’m talking about Pike and Anthony, I really liked how they were Noel and Nick’s bros. They supported both Nick and Noel when they needed a friend. I liked how they would joke and go out to get drinks. I also liked how Anthony and Pike were there when Amber had just broken up with Nick, and they went out with Noel to take their minds off things. Anthony and Pike were also a really funny duo. Anthony was the calm, teddy-bear and Pike was the kooky, weirdo in the best way. I could tell they had a closer relationship and they cared about each other because Anthony knew how much Pike liked Noel even if Pike would just tease that he liked Noel. Deep down, they all knew Pike really liked Noel but that crush would never be reciprocated. I felt bad for Pike because I think under all the jokes about his looks and him being a shorter person, he didn’t feel like people would like him because Noel didn’t like him that way. He was so worthy and deserving of finding love.

I loved that when Pike defined Noel from Tripp at the end, they shared this look where Pike knew Noel would never love him the way she loved Nick. As heart-breaking as that was for Pike, he was so cool about it because he knew that Noel and Nick were happy, and as their friend, that’s all he could ever want for them. I loved that because it’s hard when you like someone, but they end up with someone else. It feels like you are lost, but if that other person is happy and it’s meant to be, it’s not really a loss.

I know Pike will find love. Maybe he’ll find love from his striper gig 😂.

Oh gosh, I don’t even know what to say about that.

I can’t believe Nick and Anthony went incognito to save Pike from a cult, when he was actually just practicing his stripper routine 😂. We love the confidence and the dollar bills. I loved the moment when Nick, Anthony, and Pike are outside the bar and they tease Pike about being a stripper. It was just such a wholesome, bizarre, bro moment that I loved. Also, I loved the reaction that Pike and Noel had when they were at Gabby’s bachelorette party and he was performing 🤪. What a SURPRISE indeed. I would have been mortified.

Anyway, back to what I was saying in a more somber tone earlier, but Noel was closed off to a marriage and kids.

She probably didn’t want to marry anyone because that meant commitment and then losing someone she loved. But the more we get into the book, Noel got these flashbacks of happy moments with her parents. I loved loved loved the flashbacks because it was nice to see a time when Noel felt happy, loved, and carefree. I could just feel a different energy emanating from her. It was magical.

There was one scene where she is with the mom, opening up the mom’s wedding dress in its box. Noel teased her mom about trying on the wedding dress and heels. Her mom called her a princess and that she would make a beautiful bride one day. I don’t know about you, but there wasn’t even a real wedding and I was tearing up. It just hurt knowing that I could see how digging up those happy memories was hard for her because they represented dreams she used to have—a future she imagined for herself, but no more because her future changed the moment she lost her parents. That’s understandable. But gosh, it hurt because I could feel she still wanted to be a bride one day and get married, because if she had that one moment in her past where she hoped to be a bride, there was a part of her that did. I mean, of course, people and ideas change from when they are younger, but this didn’t feel like it. It felt like Noel pushed down the idea of marriage because she didn’t want to hurt.

Also, I could understand how she wouldn’t want to get married because her mom and dad wouldn’t be there 😢. That’s also really tough to understand.

There was also the memory of Noel wanting kids. I think her mom was talking to her about the birds and the bees and Noel was all grossed out, as I was too. I didn’t get any sort of talk, but I imagine I would be grossed out if I did. But the memory unlocked the part of her that was mortified at the idea of sex and how babies were made, but also how subconsciously she wanted to start a family when she was older. Now she was older, she had Nick whom she loved. She knew that he was the right person that she would want to start a family with. She just never allowed herself to think about having a family either because love meant loss and that meant pain.

“My parents had dreams for me. I had dreams for me before I lost them.”

(pg. 389)

The more she confronted these ideas she had, I could tell she was opening up to the idea of getting married and having kids. I wanted that for Noel if she wanted that too.

The more she opened up, the more I felt the book open up.

The beginning half of the book was slow with how Noel was very down on herself, saying that she didn’t want to find love and be by herself even if we all knew how much she loved Nick. She was denying herself happiness because of the pain that comes with it. I think I wrote this in another blog post, but love and pain and happiness and sorrow come hand in hand—-the good with the bad.

But when Noel started to open up about how she felt—-to herself or others—-the book became much easier to read because I could feel how much happier Noel allowed herself to be.

I liked that Noel had Nick to talk to whenever a memory would spark in her mind or she felt confused or lost. We need these people to lean on, and I’m glad he was there for her. I appreciated that he never made her feel awkward for crying a lot because she did cry a lot, but he comforted and hyped her up. As if this guy couldn’t’ melt my heart anymore in the way he treated people 😩♥️.

“For a guy with limited experience, he sure knew how to make her melt.”

(ph. 236)

There was that one conversation I quoted earlier when Noel was doubting her place in the Winter’s family, but Nick talked her down and reassured her that she was part of the family. I also really liked how he talked to her about how strong, joyful, loyal, and loving Noel was because she was also the person he went to if he needed someone to talk to or needed a laugh. He saw all—the good and the not so good—parts of her, and still chose to be there and love her. Nick actually saw Noel the way she didn’t see herself. We can be our harshest critics. I also liked how always listened to her or opened the door when she needed someone. Gosh, he knew what he was doing when he answered the door with only a towel 😏. He was playing her there. Speaking of teasing, I cackled when Nick had that business call and Noel was walking around basically in the nude in the kitchen. Nick was trying to pay attention to his Zoom meeting and he was off because Noel was seducing him on the other side 😂. We love the power of a woman. He was obviously distracted. It was fun though to see Noel not be so serious.

I also loved loved loved the moment after Noel fought with Gabby, her best friend, and she was stressed, but he initiated the whole party favor assembly line. Or don’t even get me started about how he took care of her when she was feeling sick, making her soup and watching her snot and vomit. He didn’t mind the gross parts because he loved her. This reminds me of the moment when Noel also didn’t feel good and he came over with a bunch of their favorite treats and things to pick her up. I MEAN, how freaking sweet could he be.

He was a legit good guy with a big heart. His love to care was impeccable.

Melt my heart 😂.

” . . . but if she kept shutting out the good things because she didn’t want to get hurt, then she was exactly what Amber called her.”

(pg. 292)

Empty.

When Noel pushed past some of the doubts she had concerning trying something with Nick, they eased into something more. I loved that for them because they had such love and tenderness. Also, they were pretty quick to jump each other’s bones. Gosh, I wonder who came up with the saying jump each other’s bones, it sounds funny but I don’t know when it became an innuendo. Hmm 🤔. Because Nick and Noel were starting something real this time, I loved Nick’s mom’s concern. She played defense for both of them because she loved them. The mom talked to Nick about how she was worried about him getting hurt because Nick made it known for a long time that his goals were to get married and have a family. The mom knew that Noel had the exact opposite goals. It’s tough when you love someone and things look good in a relationship, but then you realize you have different goals from that person. When you have different goals, you know that it won’t work out in the long run because of different ideas they want for themselves. Especially something as significant as getting married and starting a family, if those goals don’t align, it can be like forcing puzzle pieces to fit.

I liked that the mom and Nick had this conversation because it’s not talked about enough how sometimes goals don’t align even if a relationship works. When it comes to what a person wants for their life/future, I think that’s when you put yourself first and really think about what matters to you. Because if you say okay to something and it’s not okay, resentment and anger will build. Nick said that he and Noel talked about marriage and kids, and they did, but also he held out hope that she would change her mind. She did towards the end, but sometimes, things don’t always work out like that.

Either way, Nick was such a great guy that he knew that even if Noel didn’t want to get married or have kids, he would be happy with her because of how much he loved her. I could feel he meant it too. That’s the most beautiful sentiment I heard in a while because that’s tough—to change your goal so suddenly. But I read something in a notebook I wrote when I was fourteen. The quote was from The Mortal Instruments, but it said, “Love takes your choices away.” You can still choose when you’re in love, but for this situation, I just thought about how much Nick loved Noel and how he knew he wanted a life with her even if it wasn’t the life he always dreamed of. Love took his choices away because he loved the person he was with. Again, marriage and kids is a serious conversation and it’s not something everyone can just change about their ideas, but when I read that quote the other day, I thought about how love can make you change your plans or ideas.

I also liked that when Noel and Nick talked about the possibility of marriage and kids later in the book, Nick still never pressured Noel to rush into wanting those things because she knew Nick had always wanted those things. I liked how gentle he was with her heart because he knew how many times she’d been hurt. I’m going to keep saying this because it’s true, but he was a good guy.

Too good of a guy sometimes.

He had a CRAZY ex-girlfriend 🤪.

I never read a book with a bonkers ex, and it was irritating in a good way.

I detested Amber. I wanted her to get the heck out of the book at one point because she was just a siren call to drama. I mean, sis broke up with him!!!!! I don’t know why she was stirring the pot when she called it off.

Guess, she wanted what she couldn’t have. Can someone scream jealous and PETTY 😂?

I have too much to say about Amber, and I don’t know where to start. But let’s go with her being a petty, passive back-stabbing friend and then how she was a crazy ex-girlfriend.

So, she was a petty, back-stabbing friend. She just wasn’t a good friend to Gabby.

“It was like Amber Jekyll and B*** Hyde.”

(pg. 192)

Gabby was the sweetest, most wholesome, funny, loyal, accepting, and loving person and I LOVED her. What a character. She was awesome. I would want to be her friend ♥️. I agreed with Noel though because why was Amber friends with the nicest person? I loved how she was always there for Noel if she needed someone to talk to. Gabby was also the least judgmental person out there and understood Noel more than she understood herself. I loved how Gabby was so upfront with Noel and Amber in telling them to get along and if not, she would kick them out of her wedding. I love a boundaries queen 👏🏼.

Gabby also just saw the best in people and there’s nothing wrong with that. But sometimes when people like Amber are friends with people like Gabby, people like Gabby don’t see how they are being wronged and let people like Amber get away with the mean things they do or say because they believe that there is more good in them. That’s not a bad thing unless people like Gabby are consistently being taken advantage over and they don’t see it. Noel could see it. I could see it. But I also could see why Gabby was friends with Amber too. Amber was there for her when Gabby’s Aunt was battling cancer, and Noel had just lost her parents. Noel, of course, needed to grieve and process her loss. It also meant Noel wasn’t there for Gabby. I didn’t think it was fair that Amber made Noel feel guilty for not being a “good friend” to Gabby because Noel just lost both her parents. She needed to be there for her family and for herself. How could she take or comfort someone else when she was in immense pain? Gabby, the sweetheart she was, understood that. That was not Amber’s place to put Noel on that guilt-trip.

Also, it wasn’t Amber’s place to make Noel feel bad for not lending her parent’s sacred cabin for a bachelorette party. If that was Noel’s parents’ sacred place and she wanted to keep it sacred, I saw no reason why Noel had to give up the one of the most precious things she wanted to protect that was left to her. Noel didn’t need to do anything she didn’t want to do, and if Amber had a respectful bone in her disgusting body, she would have respected Noel’s decision. BUT NOOOO she had to make Noel feel like shiz or a bad friend for not sacrificing her parents cabin for Gabby’s bachelorette. I’m sorry, that’s a load of trash.

And don’t even get me STARTED with her shiz talking about Gabby in the bathroom. If a friend talks shiz about you behind your back, they are not a true friend and there’s nothing to be said other than that. I loved that Noel popped off on Amber and stuck up for Gabby. Now that’s a true friend—-when someone stands up for you when no one is around. I freaking cackled when Noel used Amber’s lipstick and ruined her shirt. Good for Amber, she was being a butt to Noel and Gabby. Then Amber still had the AUDACITY to call Noel a bad friend even if she wasn’t there for Gabby with her aunt. I’m sorry, then what was her excuse for being a petty piece of trash?

Oh, and the way Amber took Gabby up on her offer to pay for her bridesmaid dress??? No judgement there because I don’t know her financial situation, but she could have at least put up more of an argument not to pay like Noel did. I almost forgot, I CAN’T believe the AUDACITY Amber had to make Gabby second guess the dress she picked. I MEAN, who does that 😡!!!!???! I was ready to throw down in honor of Gabby. Also, Amber telling Gabby that her butt looked to big in her wedding dress isn’t exactly an insult in my opinion 😅, but the way Amber told Gabby this was absolutely unnecessary.

It was only time until Amber and Noel hashed it out. I felt like Noel was taking more of a high road and was the bigger person more than Amber did. It never even felt like Amber tried, more like fake tried. I don’t blame Noel for starting the food fight turned nose-breaking. I would have wanted to do something too, maybe nothing as aggressive as what Noel and Amber did because I’m not really violent, but gosh, I could understand that anger. But gosh, when Gabby got in the middle of it and she broke her nose because of Amber accidents flailing and hitting Gabby? I was SAD 😢. Gabby just wanted them to get along and she tried to stay out of their fighting until she needed to intervene like with the fact they were destroying her mom’s living room. Yea, I was thinking the same thing when they were throwing candy and ranch dressing. But I felt sad because Gabby didn’t deserve the hurt she got, or to have such drama with her wedding.

Noel and Amber hashed out their emotions. Apparently Amber had been boiling up with hatred for Noel her whole life because she thought Noel always did things better than her when they were younger. Amber thought it was a competition between the two of them, when it wasn’t. Also, when Noel’s parents passed, Noel retreated into herself and Amber thought that was selfish. I didn’t think it was selfish to take care of yourself first. But to each other, they were the villains in the story.

“It sounds like a misunderstanding that festered between two adolescent females brought on by a lack of communication. The resentment festered and instead of having a heart to heart and clearing up the infection, it turned putrid.”

“Thank you, Dr. Phil.”

(pg. 277)

Romantic and insightful 😂. Nick knew what was up between them.

Even though Amber and Noel sort of talked things out—more like getting out their true emotions—-it helped them to know where the other stood. Because they were not on the same page of why the other hated the other. I don’t think Noel and Amber could ever be close friends, but at least they know the history of their relationship to try to be. nice to each other.

You know, if Amber didn’t also make multiple passes at her boyfriend, who was her ex-boyfriend who she broke up with 🙃.

This sounds weird, but Amber gave me Obsessed vibes. You know, the 2009 movie with Beyoncé. I honestly don’t know who let an eight or nine year old me watch this movie. No wonder I remember it 🤪.

But she was downright obsessive and creepy. She kept going up to Nick in the grocery store or the parking lot. I’m sorry, get a life sis or read the room that he doesn’t like you anymore. She needed to get over herself. Or the freaking AUDACITY she had to show up to the Winter’s house for Nick’s birthday dinner to make peace and whatever game she was trying to play. SIS, SHE was not wanted there. She doesn’t have intuition whatsoever to notice that they all didn’t want her there. Nick was so nice though in talking to her because Nick would do the chivalrous thing. I just wanted to tell him he owed Amber nothing and to drop her. I don’t blame Noel for being angry at Nick for talking to his ex who was also the greatest witch out there. It felt like Nick would always go back to Amber and put her over her. She didn’t want to feel that way.

So when on their first date at that holiday festival, and Amber supposedly had a flat tire and needed someone to change it, she had to ask Nick. I mean, there were probably thousands of people at this event and she had to ask him???? She was playing a game. I was also glad Nick was going to say no. But Nick’s too good of a guy to say no to someone even if he hated her stinking guts. At least he had the decency to wait for Noel to come out the bathroom and ask her if he could change Amber’s tire. When this happened, I could feel like Nick and Noel were going downhill. I mean, this was their first date and Nick wanted to go change his crazy ex’s tire? Yea, I would have been angry as well.

It was interesting to read the whole last scene from Nick and Noel’s perspective because in Nick’s eyes

When Amber tried to kiss Nick, I was screaming in glee when Nick told her off. He said get out of here, I don’t like you. I wanted him to flip her off or something because she was getting downright annoying and was harassment in my opinion. He already made his boundaries clear, and he wasn’t respecting that. I thought it was funny when all his parent’s faces fell when he said that he changed Amber’s tire. They probably felt the disappointment I felt 😅. NICK! I mean, I get it because he was a good guy and all, but if he had a harassing ex who made his current girlfriend feel insecure, he shouldn’t have changed Amber’s tire even if Noel said it was okay.

We all knew it was not okay.

There was a part of me that agreed with Noel because Nick should have stuck with her on their first date rather than run to the ex and be the hero. But I also really agreed with Nick. I mean, she told him it was okay, and you know most guys! They can’t read a woman’s mind, so if she said yes, he’s going to think it means yes. Nick was only following what he thought Noel was okay with because that’s what she said. If she was just upfront with Nick and was like, “No, I’m not okay with you changing her tire,” then Nick would have respected Noel’s boundaries and wouldn’t have changed Amber’s tires. There was miscommunication. I also agree that it wasn’t fair to test Nick because he really didn’t know. He wasn’t reading into the situation because he is a good guy who does nice things for people even if they don’t deserve it. Noel knows that and understood that, but I felt it was a bit harsh for Nick to throw the whole self-sabotage thing in her face. Nick’s right, though, that Noel was finding ways for the relationship not to work out because she was scared of falling in love with him. I also felt like Amber got way into Noel’s head and played these mind games with her because Amber knew how Noel would feel when Nick chose to help. So really, this is Amber’s fault 😂. I’m kidding, but kind of not.

But when Nick said he gave up, I was like DARN. That’s how I knew he was tired of trying to make something work if Noel wasn’t trying either. And that’s so tough because he loved her and wanted to make things work. But a relationship doesn’t work if both people don’t put in the effort.

I freaking laughed when Anthony and Pike got a call from Nick after they decided they wanted to comfort Noel that night. I also loved how Pike answered the phone. If no one answers their phone like that, I don’t want it.

“Tonight it’s tits before di**s.”

(pg. 332)

Sorry for the crude humor, but gosh that was just funny. I’m a child.

But I also loved how Anthony and Pike reasoned with Noel because she was being a bit harsh on Nick. I laughed when Anthony popped off on Noel not trusting Nick even if she knew that he was a good guy who would take care of everyone. We love best friends who understand you and talk some sense into you. They were providing Noel free therapy.

“I’m not wrong. You kept Nick at arm’s length and once you let him in, you couldn’t deny your chemistry. You invented this conflict, and now, boom! You can pretend you tried, but you’re lying to yourself.”

(pg. 335)

Yea, she was.

The flash drive of music was a nice touch as a grand gesture, considering the title of the book. I also loved how even though they fought and were mending their relationship, they still took care of each other. What a sweetie. I also loved how Noel finally wanted to look through her parents’ things.

What was so special about this scene was how it started with Nick and Noel, looking through things she wanted to keep or donate, and how Anthony and Pike joined them. Her family, her rocks, her biggest support system was there for such a difficult time for her. They eased the ache and pain that revisiting their things would make her feel. And I loved that. They played with dolls and talked about the good times.

She was never alone. She had her chosen family.

“On the last few weeks, she’d let memories back in. Realized that by pushing her parents and past away, she hadn’t been able to move forward with her life. It left her stunned and closed to all the possibilities life had for her, including love.”

(pg. 349)

Exactly ♥️.

When you don’t talk about people you loved and tossed, you kind of keep their memories alive but only within you. When you share those memories with others, you keep the memories alive in them as well. I liked it though when Nick reminded her that her parents would want her to love and live the life she wanted—-they would want her to live. She went so long without living because she was afraid of that love or to love as much as she loved her parents, but we should let love in eventually. Love and love are two important things.

Also, I FREAKING CACKLED at how they wanted to get it when Pike and Anthony were still over 😂. I was like, “You know, they’re still there right?” YIKES. I laughed with how they knocked on Nick’s door and teased them. I also cackled with how the first time Nick and Noel wanted to get it on, the mom and dad came. They always get interrupted. I laughed that the mom saw Noel’s underwear. I would be mortified. Also, I never heard someone describe a butt as the globes of his a** 😂 (pg. 159). The GLOBES 🤪? Oh my gosh. I’m screaming. They really had some awkwardly funny moments. And don’t get me started on how they compared each other to donkey’s and pirates. Oh, Noel’s pirate eye because Amber struck her too hard with an M&M. Who knew they could be effective weapons?

I loved when Noel was at Gabby’s bachelorette, Nick texted he loved her, and the ease at how Noel texted she loved him back, was so cute 🥺. She really opened up her heart. I thought she would catch the bouquet at Gabby’s wedding because how cute would that be. But I get it, it was too soon.

Also, my heart just about melted when Nick and Noel performed at the Mistletoe Concert, and before going on, Amber came AGAIN to talk to Nick. She was the ick that wouldn’t quit. But I loved loved loved how Nick gave this whole boundaries talk with Amber on MIC 👏🏼!!! I loved that for him!! Let the world know how much you love Noel and let the world know how much of a prick Amber is to keep trying to stir something. Nick said I’m tired of you. But gosh, he was so respectful about it too.

Also, the fact that he got her a cat at the end was cute—-what a gem 🥺.

” . . . I make an effort to listen to the things that make you happy.”

(pg. 391)

That was the real kicker to why this scene was so cute *sigh*

Nick’s such a good guy ♥️.

Where can I find one?

Would love to know.

I really loved how the tone of the book shifted when Noel opened her heart to love. I also loved the range of characters we had because they all had interesting and fun personalities. I really loved Gabby, and would love to read a book about her. She’s just so likable. I would not want to read a book about Amber 😅. But maybe I could. Maybe that would be interesting to see her actually change and become a good person. I think there could be a story with Amber exploring her jealousy with Noel and her anger. I also loved the idea of a found family with the Winters and Anthony and Pike. I forget where in the book this scene was, but I loved it when Noel saw the tree with all her family pictures on it, and then she stood with the Winter’s and Anthony and Pike to take a picture with her family and her found family—building the old with the new ♥️. Noel just seemed so happy in that moment because she knew that she was so loved despite having lost her two greatest loves. She finally felt like she belonged and didn’t feel bad for it.

I really enjoyed seeing Noel heal and getting to know such a great guy and family.

What was your favorite part of the book? Least favorite part? 

What did you think of the book? Let me know below in the comments as I love hearing from you all 💕

What is your favorite holiday song? My favorites are either All I Want For Christmas is You by Mariah Carey because DUH or Mistletoe by Justin Bieber.

I hope you have a beautiful day whenever and wherever you might be reading this 😊.

And as always, with love,

Rating

4.58 Full Bloom Flowers

Characters: It was a beautiful journey to see Noel open up. I am also a huge fan of chivalrous Nick and lovable Gabby. I also adored Nick’s sisters.

Plot: Not a light holiday read, but full of heart because sometimes the holidays are not the most cheerful time of the year because of what we’ve been through. I liked that Codi Hall explored that sadness, but ended on a hopeful note.

Writing: There was so much fun and intrigue and heart wrapped up in a nice bow in this book.

Romance: I loved the friends to lovers plot and how they opened up to each other and learned to take a chance on love. I also appreciated the difficult conversations they had about having different goals.