Super Fake Love Song by David Yoon Book Review
“I spun into the hallway. I paused. I closed my eyes:
Get into character.
Normally, I would take a moment to consider all the ramifications of this thought. Get into character, meaning stash away your real persona to make room for the fake one.
But I didn’t have a moment to think, because now I could see Cirrus smiling up at me from the bottom of the stairs.”
(pg. 155)
About
Author: David Yoon
Other books by David Yoon: Frankly in Love
Genre: Young Adult Conteompaorry Romance
Click to read other book reviews
Synopsis
When Sunny meets Cirrus, he can’t believe how cool and confident she is. So when Cirrus mistakenly thinks Sunny plays guitar, he accidentally winds up telling her he’s the front man of a rock band.
Before he knows it, Sunny is knee-deep in the lie: He gets his best friends to form a fake band with him and starts dressing like a rock star. But no way can he trick this amazing girl into thinking he’s cool, right?
Just when Sunny is about to come clean, Cirrus asks to see them play sometime. Gulp.
Now there’s only one thing to do: Fake it till you make it.
🎶 Review 🎶
Spoilers Contained Below
To the nerds and fake rockstars,
I will start by saying I actually liked this David Yoon book 🤪. Not that David Yoon is a bad writer, far from it! I just wasn’t a fan of Frankly in Love, and frankly (pun intended), I was supposed to write a book review about the book after I read it a few years back, but I couldn’t bring myself to write one because 1) I forgot everything that happened in the book after a few months of reading it 2) I had not motivation to explain my thoughts about it. So I didn’t go into Super Fake Love Song with high expectations, but I will say . . . not bad. I really enjoyed Super Fake Love Song. I liked how it talked about this idea of faking who you are. I enjoyed the family dynamic more, I liked the friendship, and I appreciated the contents and the chapter titles.
Gosh, knows no one creates chapter titles anymore, so I appreciate when an author intentionally does so. And I liked how each part of the book was strategically named and how fitting it was. The chapter titles were also fitting and made reading such a joy.
I will say the book started kind of slow for me and picked up when Gunner and Sunny started to become friends, and when Sunny really got into the Mortals. But the beginning of the book was a slop alright.
Sunny Dae gave me very insecure, self-deprecating, embarrassed, don’t care, cynic vibes. And I just didn’t vibe with him because that’s not the type of people I hang around. That didn’t mean I didn’t think Sunny was a bad person. He’s a good person, I just wasn’t his number one fan. So basically I didn’t like Sunny’s personality 🤪. I’m joking. But I liked the parent’s humor in naming their son’s Gray Dae and Sunny Dae. If I were a parent and I could make a punny name, you bet I would 😂. But yea, Sunny just screamed INSECURE and cynical.
First, he cared too much what other people thought of him. I get it. I care too much too. And I think it’s natural for people to care what other people think of us. But sometimes it becomes too overwhelming and toxic when we constantly think about what other people might think of us because then it makes us hyper aware of all the things we should do to be liked or to not do to be liked. And a big part of Sunny was he was a nerd. He liked his D&D games, cosplaying, video things, gosh I’m butchering this! 🤪. He liked nerdy things. And there’s nothing, absolutely NOTHING wrong with being a nerd and liking games, cosplay, or video creation building/DIYs with things you are obsessed with. If you like to do something a healthy amount and it makes you happy, by gosh all means go do it. Do not not do it because you are so scared and embarrassed by what other people think because gosh knows what other people think does not matter in the grand scheme of things. And in high school it feels like the world is just sooooooo incredibly small and that everything is monumentally embarrassing or important and that what you do will stick with you for the rest of your life. And I am here to tell you that the world is sooooo much bigger than high school. When you look back on high school, it will not matter who was popular, who was the jock, who had the best grades, who played D&D, etc. It will not matter. No one will care. So might as well not give two hoots about what people think in high school, yet alone life. It is not their life and it is not their happiness or passion and if someone wants to judge you for something you love, then that’s their issue and not yours. You do you. You do what makes you happy and let other people hate on it because you know what? They are probably just angry at the world and need to take it out on someone, maybe they don’t have a hobby or passion like you do. So let them take it out, but don’t let it get to you.
But you know, Sunny did not have me as a friend to tell him to not give two hoots about other people. So Sunny was insecure and hid who he was and his passions. In the book, he faked being a rockstar, but truly I felt he faked being true to himself everyday when he walked through the school halls. He felt like he couldn’t be open about his love for his DIYs and his games. I mean, that’s cool. Maybe I don’t necessarily like what Sunny likes, but I respect that he likes something and is passionate about it. And it’s cool he can make DIYS. Instead of bagging on people’s passions, we should support them. And it just sucked he felt the need to hide something so important in his life.
I come from a small neighborhood where reading is seen as weird. And I remember in middle school I would carry around a book in my hand everywhere I went. And people at school would look at me funny because I was that weird kid who liked to read and would carry City of Heavenly Fire like the Bible. I felt weird. And I stopped carrying books to school because I knew people judged me for it. Part of me still gets embarrassed to tell people in my neighborhood or community that I like reading because it’s seen as weird. No one likes reading. I would literally be carrying a book at the mall and a random stranger would say to me, “Oh! You read? Keep it up!” And I know it was not meant to be sad as a bad thing, but I took it as a bad thing because it felt weird that they thought it was unusual for someone to read and that I should keep reading because it was not common. I don’t know. So I understand Sunny and his need to hide his passions. Gosh, knows that’s why I have an instagram and a whole book account so I can connect with people who don’t make me feel weird about my passions 🙂.
So like Sunny, I hide. I’m a nerd too.
I’ve been insecure.
But I understood why Sunny was even more insecure than most people. I really liked how David Yoon began the book with a loser origin story to mimic a superhero origin story. I thought that was an interesting and creative idea. It was also kind of funny 😂. I just want to scream nonsense at the people who destroyed Sunny’s Paladin figurine and made him feel like a child for liking his figurines. Like don’t people have anything better to do than make someone else feel bad about what they like? How about they get a hobby too. And the fact they called Sunny a nerd? Gosh, being a nerd isn’t a bad thing, but people have made it a bad thing.
“Nerd was an epithet of shame. People called me that because I did not wear the right clothes, talk the right way, or like the right things. Nerd was a catchall term for someone who failed to fit any established terms—-a pejorative cousin to whatchamacallit for inscrutable objects or Schultz for unidentifiable stains.”
(pg. 203)
Be PROUD to be a nerd. Being a nerd is cool. I think nerds are cool. I mean, being smart and passionate about something is cool.
I just don’t understand what “right” means—the “right” clothes, taking the “right” way, or liking the “right” things. because of these “established terms.” What is right? It absolutely is subjective and doesn’t matter. But Sunny has internalized this idea that he should be ashamed for being a nerd because it’s “wrong.”
“I could not afford to cry—everywhere was now a dangerous place—so I kicked a hole in the orange earth with my heel and dropped the chunk in. I covered it over. I stomped thrice to mask the seam.
And I stepped back into the sun to survey the new realm before me.”
(pg. 4)
That just broke my heart because his origin story was how he started to think all people were bullies/sucked. And how he felt the need to not be himself anymore because it wasn’t okay. And I think people all go through this phase in life where they feel like they have to hide something from others because it’s not seen as “cool” or “accepted.” So we let these hobbies, likes, or whatever go because we have to “grow up” and “fit in.”
And Sunny was bitter and slightly angry. But he was also very insecure because of how he was labeled. Being called a loser multiple times absolutely WRECKS someone’s confidence.
Sunny’s insecurity was reflected in the way he took care of himself and carried himself. He wears his baggy cargo shorts and his loose graphic tees. And you know what that says? That said I don’t give two bananas about what people think of me because people have already thought the worst and I don’t want to try anymore. I knew the way Sunny dressed felt like him giving up on himself. It also felt like Sunny knew he was a loser, so he dressed like one too. It just broke my heart the way Sunny lost his love for himself because others took that away. The way a person dresses says a lot.
The way a person carries him/herself says a lot too. Sunny walked in school with his head held low and a slouch . . . or well, I imagined a slouch. I just didn’t see someone confident. I saw someone who stuck to the shadows because he felt like he belonged there and didn’t want to stand out because he knew he would get picked on. This also connects to why Sunny didn’t stand out with what he wore. He tried to fit in because apparently fitting in is being “cool.”
Honestly, fitting in is overrated and boring.
If we were all so concerned and interested in fitting in, everyone would be boring with a capital B. People should like what they like and being different and liking different things is perfectly fine.
I felt Sunny’s anger at the world and other people came across as cynicism. I didn’t like Sunny’s humor or cynicism and it’s one of the things that made me go ehhhhh. I just didn’t like how negative and melancholy he always sounded about things. I understood his humor, but I didn’t like it because I felt it came from a place of being angry at the world. I mean, it’s not bad to be cynical and to guard your heart, but there’s a difference between being guarded and protecting your heart. Guarding yourself is when you put up a wall because you don’t want anyone to get in, so you bite back so others won’t penetrate in. But protecting yourself is putting on layers and letting people you trust come in and peel those layers back—-like an onion.
Sunny had a grade level shield protecting him.
“My cynicism, I realized, was my way of removing myself from the equation so that I could not get hurt.”
(pg. 257)
He uses his cynicism as a way to hide, remove, and shield himself from the hurt he felt from others. If he instantly shuts down everything with cynicism, it’s easier for him to feel okay because he believes the world sucks, so if he just acted like the world sucked it would better shield him from hurt. And that was no way to think.
“Because” I said finally, “like the rest of humanity I’m just another pathetic soul scoring for likes in a world deadened to all sensation?”
(pg. 257)
I mean, how utterly morbid is that. I understood what Sunny was talking about—how we have become so consumed with wanting to be liked by others that we don’t feel anything. But gosh, the way he phrased it was so sad because it highlighted how angry and hurt he was.
“Why do you make your videos?” said Gray.
My belly quivered. Because I’ve been bullied. Because it’s easier to hide behind my computer screen.
Because my big brother hasn’t been there to protect me.”
(pg. 257)
The only light in Sunny’s life (joke intended) was that he had his Youtube channel with Jamal and Milo. It’s kind of like why I started my blog—I wanted to have a platform where I felt comfortable sharing my passion. Sunny, Jamal, and Milo knew that there were people out there that did like D&D/the game they play, and so making videos was there way of being who they are, but still hiding it a bit. It really is easy to hide behind a computer screen with fake names or not showing yourself because it still creates human connection, but in a safe space. I know what it’s like to hide behind a computer screen . . . obviously 🤪. But yea . . . it’s just a sad world where people who are “different” can’t do what they love in real life because it’s not as accepted, so we hide or find somewhere else that accepts us.
Or others.
I appreciated Jamal and Milo. They are true ride or dies and loyal friends. Utmost loyal friends! I love that for Sunny. I mean, the dude basically asked his friends to lie for him and they literally were down to start a band. I know friends who would be like, “No, dude, your lie, your problem.” Or “no, I won’t be in a fake band.” But I loved how down Jamal and Milo were and how into it they got. I loved how they actually enjoyed playing the drums and the guitar even though they didn’t know what they were doing, but hey, they did it because they wanted to help a friend in the name of love. I mean, get you friends who would start a band with you and do it fully?
Also, shoutout to Milo and Jamal for always being there for Sunny and changing their plans to fit what Sunny wanted.
Because Sunny liked a girl. 😆
Honestly, I didn’t really feel the love in this story, something was just missing to make me be hooked on the love story. I don’t know, I felt the same way about the love story in Frankly in Love. I would have just liked to know Sunny more as a person and who he was without his cynicism. Because I think Sunny was a pretty cool person when he wasn’t angry and sad at the world. But we didn’t really get to know the real Sunny or figure out what felt like Sunny. More notably, we didn’t get to know Cirrus. We got to know her very surface level—her traveling around a lot—-but I didn’t feel like we knew her. We didn’t know her personality that much, her likes or dislikes, and just the deeper parts of what makes a character and what connects you to them. I just didn’t feel connected to Cirrus and it felt like she was just a girl in the book who was thrown in for Sunny to like.
And that made me question if Sunny liked Cirrus because he actually liked her or if he just liked her because she was the first girl to ever pay him some sort of positive attention. It also made me wonder if Sunny just liked her because he was the only girl who would give him the time of day 😆. I guess, though, it’s easier to reinvent yourself and be whoever you want to be when someone doesn’t know you just yet. So that’s why it was so easy for Sunny to fake it.
When Sunny said Gray’s room, guitar, and clothes were his, I was like . . . bro, you are going to GET it. She is going to find out you lied to her and she’s going to be PIZZED 😂.
“I’m here to tell you that all you did was make a mistake. . . you’re not stupid. Just desperate. And incoherent.”
(pg. 58)
I mean 😂 Sunny was desperate for some sort of love and validation with a girl so he messed up and told a stupid lie.
“My old familiar clothes now felt baggy and tired and just kind of indifferent. I prepared to descend the staircase into the day that lay beyond.
But I stared at the black clothes lurking under the bed. They were far from indifferent—they were different.”
(pg. 44)
When Sunny started to wear Gray’s old clothes to fit his lies, it really changed the way he held and felt about himself. When he dressed mediocrely it was because he stopped caring for himself, but donning his brother’s clothes gave me confidence. It made him feel different because the clothes were tighter, more defined, and stylish—-they stood out—which was everything Sunny tried so hard not to do. And when he walked through school in those clothes, I could imagine the looks he got. Sunny talked about getting the Look (the once over). I think everyone needs a confidence boost once in a while, but gosh were the Looks he got doing wonders for his head. But that’s okay. . . the kid felt like a loser and now he was standing up straight and attracting attention. It made him feel good.
And that’s what mattered.
People saw this new Sunny and they thought of him differently. Because if you carry yourself all woe-is-me and indifferently, people will notice that and treat you exactly how you treat yourself. But if your respect yourself and carry yourself well, people will notice and will treat you with the confidence and power you hold yourself to.
Gunner and Sunny’s relationship was interesting.
Gunner’s your typical bully who’s really hurting other people because he’s insecure about himself. And yes, I just attacked him right at the core 😂. Because he constantly belittled and ridiculed Sunny for YEARS, making Sunny feel like a loser and like he couldn’t’be who he was. And you know what? GUNNER WAS A NERD.
He was a nerd and he couldn’t be a nerd because his dad was the epitome of a toxic man who just wanted his son to play football, win trophies, and date girls. When Sunny went to Gunner’s house, I could already tell by how desolate and tense Gunner’s house felt that that was one of the reasons Gunner was the way he was. Gunner had a dad who was hard on him, so Gunner was hard on others. The way Gunner differed from Sunny was Gunny had aggressive anger and Sunny had inward anger and sadness, so they reflected their hurt differently. But they were the same.
Also, I think if someone is so scared of their parents, that is telling to the treatment of the child. So Gunner was probably not being treated well and because he knew nothing but being harsh, that’s the way he acted.
“I also felt depleted, because the thought of him yearning in wretched flightless solitude made my soul heavy. Wanting more from his sidekick, the football team, and that dad of his. But being too afraid to ask.
I felt depleted because Gunner, I realized, was ashamed of himself.
And finally: I felt depleted because I had shame, too. My shame was bad enough that I had turned left into Gray’s room instead of right into mine that fateful night.
. . . All human life seemed driven by shame—the fear of being the incorrect self. . . As if shame were an evolutionary necessary evil designed to keep the tribes of society simultaneously together and apart.
If there were no shame, would we be freer? Or just descend into chaos?”
(pg. 202)
Similar to Sunny, Gunner was also hiding part of who he was because of this “correct/right” self people wanted of him—-or what people want of everyone. And I really liked how David Yoon goes into depth by questioning what it means to be a nerd versus cool and how it questions the norms of society. Because I would have to agree that many of us hide because we are ashamed of who we are or what we do or like because we think it is wrong. In that shame, we become afraid and embarrassed to tell anyone who we really are, and then in that, we get lost with who we are. Because how are we supposed to know who we are if we can’t even be honest with ourselves.
Gunner had surface level friends who talked about girls, cars, and farts. I mean, when Sunny said the car and football thing, I literally laughed out loud. Because those are very safe topics anyone could talk about. I felt Gunner wanted someone who understood him and talked to him about more than just weather-level talk.
“It depresses me how people blindly believe their car is an expression of their value as a human being.”
(pg 101)
So it was heart-felt when Gunner confided in Sunny about the D&D game and a level he needed help with. I thought it was cute how Gunner remembered a conversation he eavesdropped on years ago on the track field. Gunner remembered Sunny, Jamal, and Milo were taking about this level. I was just pleasantly surprised how Gunner remembered what they were talking about, but it was also surprising how he listened to them all those years ago because he cared and he wanted to relate to them. But he never did. He was angry at them instead because of how honest the three of them could be, and how true to themselves they could be when he couldn’t be.
Once Gunner and Sunny talked to each other and understood each other, I liked how their complex relationship turned into a wonderful friendship where Gunner respected Sunny. And I believe Sunny and Gunner wouldn’t have become friends if Sunny didn’t grow the bravery to talk to Gunner. I liked how Gunner and Sunny went to a party together and once Gunner gave the head-nod to his friends that Sunny was cool, they all treated Sunny as so. It’s ridiculous how much influence people have. I also liked how Gunner kept Sunny’s secret, and even helped Sunny out with the whole band thing.
“Why’d you think you had to pretend?” he said with a petulant growl. “You didn’t have to pretend, silly.”
I freshened my grip on my handlebars. “Because I’m stupid, Gunner.”
“In that case,” said Gunner, having himself off, “I wish I was as stupid as you.”
(pg. 237)
You never have to pretend to be someone you are not to make other people like you because people should like you for you.
Faking who you are or just faking it in general was a big point of the book. I appreciated the message because that’s also why I liked Super Fake Love Song more than I liked Frankly in Love; to me, this book had more depth.
“What person isn’t just a made-up thing in the first place? Is it the fakery that makes us real? Is anything real?”
(pg. 218)
I thought these were interesting questions to bring up. I mean . . . yea. I guess, we are all made up of things or people who influence us to be who we are today. As someone who watches probably an unhealthy amount of Youtube 😂, I know I get heavily influenced to dress how others dress or to want to be how other people are. And I do not think I’m faking who I am, but I speak for myself when I say, yea, sometimes in my head I like to envision myself as this super cool, living rich and pretty person because of everything that influences me. Along the way, I am self-aware to know that maybe I stop being fully me and that begs the question of who we are down to our core if we do not let other people influence us to be who we are? I. mean, I think we all are influenced by other people and it’s just about how much we take that influence to heart and how much we make that person us. And I think Sunny kind of gets lost in who he is as he continues to fake it because he no longer felt like this nerd in his baggy cargo shorts. He was someone who liked being in a band and wearing tight clothes. So was he faking it after a while? I don’t think so.
Sunny’s whole journey reminded me of the saying fake it until you make it.
Sunny started as a fake rock star who said things like, “To metal.” 🤪 But after a while his cool, rock-star persona seemed to become him, and that’s why Sunny gained all this confidence to be more authentically him. Truthfully, I think Sunny had it in him to be cool this whole time. I think he had the power to be noticed, to dress cool, and to have all these friends if only he allowed himself to believe he was cool and if he allowed himself to stop caring what other people thought. I think we all have it within us to be this “cool” confident, collected version of ourselves, but we often talk ourselves down because we think someone else is super duper cool and we can’t ever be like them—the grass is greener on the other side.
But like Gunner, that’s not always true 😕.
So I thought as much as it was wrong Sunny hid who he was and faked everything, it helped him grow as a person he needed to become. I can’t be mad at that. We grow through what we go through, am I right?
Also, I couldn’t help but think of the quote, “When you focus on the good, the good gets better.” When Sunny focused on the good of himself, he only got better as a person—-confident. Again, there’s nothing wrong with that.
“The only way to learn is by copying someone first.”
(pg. 256)
Sunny faked being cool partially because he had a cool brother he wanted to be.
I know EXACTLY what that’s like—-to live in the shadow of a smarter, hotter, cooler sibling. You feel insignificant because you think you can never be like them, so you just give up on yourself and take your place as the shadow. I felt like Sunny did that until he stepped out of Gray’s shadow and into the spotlight of his own life. You know, that main character Gen Z thing 😆. I’m a Gen Z, I would know.
I would also know what it’s like copying a sibling. Siblings, especially if they are older, are the easiest and most obvious people you can look up to. I look up to my siblings, specifically my sister. I tried to be like her—dress like her and have her loud, out-going personality. But that wasn’t for me. But it’s tricky when you have a sibling who is cooler because you feel like you have to live up to them in some way, and that people expect that of you.
Sunny felt like he had to live up to Gray’s coolness in some way too. Sunny also thought himself inadequate in comparison. I tell you, comparison truly is the thief of joy.
But like Gunner, sometimes we think people who have it all figured out or who look like they have their -ish together, don’t.
Gray didn’t have it figured out.
He came home after trying in LA for years with multiple bands. He finally gave up and started a corporate job because he felt that was his last resort when his dreams didn’t work out. My gosh, does it suck to not have your dream work out 😢. I felt for the brother because I could tell he wasn’t happy where he was in life with what he was doing. It kind of reminds me of my brother in how he came back from college and he didn’t have a job. He tried at his dream but it wasn’t working out, so he got a normal 9-5 job. He would come home saying he hated his job, he would complain about his work, or say how he didn’t like his work. My brother just didn’t seem happy and it hurt to see someone who I looked up to, so disheartened and unmotivated by his life because things didn’t work out. And it sucks.
Sunny was a good brother in listening to Gray and not giving up on him because Sunny could tell Gray wasn’t happy. I mean, Gray really darn keyed that car in anger. I don’t blame Gray for keying the dad’s car. The parents seriously could have gone to at least one of Gray’s shows in his life. Them not showing up was like them saying they didn’t believe in Gray or support him. On top of not achieving your dreams, not even having someone to believe in you or support you through it, sucks even more. I wanted to give Gray a hug.
Because you know, he wasn’t this cool person. He went through all this real life shiz.
He was also faking it too. He had to fake that he was out in LA doing all this cool guy shiz. In reality, he was getting rejected from labels because he wasn’t “authentic” enough or good enough.
And Gray also saw Sunny as the cool one—the grass is always greener on the other side.
I really loved the brother relationship in this story. Absolutely loved.
I loved how Gray helped Sunny, Milo, and Jamal become this cool band. He was like their band leader or mentor, which I felt like he was going to become. I thought either he was going to be part of their band at one point or be the band leader. He was the band coach. Honestly, he should be a band coach or teacher, not like a marching band coach, but a band band coach. I’m also just surprised they were all able to pull this off. I really liked Mr. Tweed 🙂. He was a pride and true teacher for believing in Sunny, Milo, and Jamal from day one and persuading them to be in the talent show. Get you a teacher like Mr. Tweed 👌🏼. It’s also funny how AWFUL 😂 they sounded from day one, but amazing how much they have grown to be ready for the talent show.
“Because you guys already have the discipline to do the work. It’s good habits from all your nerd prop making. It’s inspiring.”
(pg. 249)
You could not call Sunny, Jamal, and Milo lazy 👏🏼.
90% was one of my favorite chapters with how sweet it was. I liked how supportive Gray was of the band and how he let them use his song. I mean, I knew from the minute Sunny listened to Gray’s song and the whole starting-a-band thing, that Sunny was going to use that song. I thought Gray would have been more made about it, but hey, good for them he wasn’t.
I liked how before the performance, the Mortals said, “To metal.” 🤪 I would have been offended if they didn’t 😆.
But gosh, did the chapter Loser hit differently 🙈
“You thought we couldn’t’ pull this off,” I hissed, “because we’re just a bunch of pathetic nerds faking it to be cool.”
“I’m just tryna help,” said Gray.
“Help prove that we’re losers?” I said. “Because good job. We were already losers before, and we’re even bigger losers now.”
(pg. 290)
Man, Sunny really had to ham it up with the pathetic losers. I just wanted to pull a Milo and scream at him because DUH his mic was on. IDIOT! He’s never seen a movie before 😆.
Sunny, Sunny, Sunny.
You could say they were bigger losers now 😂.
Gosh, you can call yourself a loser, but call your friends losers. Now that’s pathetic. I would be hurt too.
Honestly, I was waiting for his charade to go to pieces 😂.
I mean, c’mon, there had to be conflict!
Gosh, Cirrus ran out of their like no tomorrow and I don’t blame a sis for booking the next flight out 😆. Sis, he was an ENTIRE red flag and you should have ran the other way from the get-go. I still didn’t really care for the romance. I didn’t care when they did their weird virtual reality date or when they did the nasty because gosh knows I did not feel the love and they were rushing it. Honestly, sis didn’t even know who he was 😂. I don’t blame her, I’m hurt for her because here she was letting someone into her life and he wasn’t even honest about who he was. And I wouldn’t have believed anything out of his mouth either.
Not with those lies 🤪.
But I also wondered the same thing Sunny did—-would Cirrus have liked him if he was his real nerdy self to her?
I don’t know.
And that’s hard.
And that’s why I can’t say I really liked them as a couple. They just weren’t real.
I think Cirrus wouldn’t have liked Sunny the nerd at first because, gosh in her mind she would have probably thought nerd alert. But then, I think once she gave Sunny a chance (Sunny with a chance if you will 😉), Cirrus would have liked him. Sure, he was a nerd but there’s nothing wrong with that and at least he would have been true to himself. But Sunny didn’t give her the chance to know the real her because he assumed no one liked him because of the bullying, hurt, and insecurity he felt.
We all know that Sunny called his friends pathetic nerd losers because that’s how he felt about himself and her reflected all his inner cynicism and hate to others. And it hurt them.
“The thing is,” I said, “there was no protecting myself. Because I started to believe the bullies. I started to believe I was a loser. I never meant to call you guys losers. I was talking about me.”
(pg. 320)
I liked the scene when Sunny went to apologize to Milo and Jamal as he should. Sunny really opened up about his past hurt. Words hurt. And I think Sunny was traumatized by his past so much it held him back from being his true self. It impacted his self-perception and confidence for YEARS.
So here is your daily reminder that your words have power. Don’t forget how it can hurt or heal someone. I hope it’s the latter.
But thinking about Sunny, I wondered why we tease people for being who they are or different when we are all the same on this inside and out—-losers, nerds, geeks, etc.? We are all these labels and more, so why do we hide these labels and think they are a bad thing to be? Why have we made them a bad thing to be? Why can’t we just break down the stigmas and labels so we can all just be authentically ourselves? I think we all hide the nerd, the fangirl, the geeky parts of ourselves because it’s not “acceptable” by society? But who FREAKING says? We all are weird. So we need to stop making people feel wrong about it.
Apart from my tangent, I also liked how Sunny realized how grateful he was for Milo and Jamal’s kindness and friendship. They accepted him as he was and were always there for him—-heck, they started a band for him—but he called them losers.
When Sunny walked away from them that day, it was such a dramatic scene. But Milo and Jamal are true ride or dies—-literally rode a bike to catch up to Sunny. They were loyal friends. Get yourself friends like Milo and Jamal. I literally love them 💜.
Gray loved them.
Gosh, when he pushed his brother into oncoming traffic, my mind was like, “Oh, is this going to be a murder story now?” 😰 I didn’t know Sunny had it in him. I didn’t like that he did that.
I think the moment Sunny saw Gray as a drunk, washed up band wanna-be, he thought his brother was no longer cool. And it’s a shift beneath your feet when you thought someone who was so put together and admirable, isn’t. They are just human.
From Gray’s perspective, he always was jealous of Sunny and how cool he was. Sunny made fast friends with Milo and Jamal—-friends who loved him for him. They were friends who stuck by Sunny. Gray never had that. He had fleeting bands. Being cool can be lonely 😕.
So it made me think about how cool is subjective. Just like beauty, popularity, fame, etc.
Many things that are difficult to explain or can’t be explained are subjective.
Coolness is one.
To me, being cool isn’t about how many friends you have, how big your following is, if you are the jock or the head cheerleader. Being cool isn’t being the star of the show or the lead in the band. Being cool isn’t having all this money, a big house, a nice car, a million trophies. Being cool isn’t about having it all figured out or being confident all the time. Being cool is being part of something that makes you happy and gives you passion. Being cool is having loyal people in your life who you can tell anything to without judgements or questions. Being cool is being confused, scared, sad, worried, and other emotions because life is just complicated and we do not always have it together.
Being cool isn’t always what we knock it up to be.
Lame as it may sound, being cool is being you.
So be you.
I liked how the ending chapters of the book paralleled the beginning with how it talked about Sunny walking down the hall again. But this time he was less cynical about it. He had Gunner as a friend and Auggie. They actually had a real friendship because they could talk about anything other than cars and girls 😂. Thank goodness for that. It was also sweet how we saw a gentler side to Gunner and how nervous he got around girls.
I was happy Gray was going to give music another shot. That was his dream and he should. I also liked how Sunny’s parents were going to work less to pay attention to their sons and be supportive of them. I understood how the parents felt; They felt like they needed to work all the time to provide a stable life for their sons so they didn’t have to work as hard as they did. It’s a sentiment many Asian families share, and I believe it’s because we come from different countries and we had to build a life for ourselves wherever we moved. And for our ancestors or parents, it wasn’t easy, but yet, they want to make a better life for us 💜. I also liked that moment when Sunny asked if his parents were happy. I don’t ask my parents this enough. You know, your parents work hard everyday. Ask them if they are happy with what they are doing? Have a conversation and get to know your parents a bit more ☺️.
I also liked how Sunny returned to his nerd roots of making DIYs and videos. Sunny, Milo, and Jamal all got the recognition and love they deserved. And it goes to show you that there will be people out there who make you feel like you don’t belong, but there are always going to be somewhere where you do. Find those places. Trust me, you are not alone 💜.
This would not have been a proper romance if Sunny and Cirrus did not have a HEA. I did not care 😆. I’m joking, I kind of cared.
“”You are very talented,” said the woman. “You are a natural.”
“I mostly fake it,” I said, and walked away.”
(pg. 334)
Not Sunny serenading an empty house 🤪.
He didn’t know. But the gesture was sweet. I think that’s what the Bromance Book Club would call a grand gesture 😂. IYKYK. Ooooh look at me, using abbreviations. I’ve officially hit a new laziness 😂.
But Cirrus did come back in nerd regalia. Kind of an epic move. I admire that she did such a grand gesture for Sunny and that she was going to give them a try again. I still don’t believe she would have fully liked nerd Sunny at first, but hey, whatever she said 🤪.
But I did not think Sunny was the nerd we started with. The nerd we started with was insecure, indifferent, cynic, and bitter. But Sunny was confident, loved, supported, still a nerd, but always cool. He just had to realize it.
And I loved that for him. I really enjoyed his arc as a person.
And I liked how by the end of the story he no longer took himself too seriously to be this cool, perfect person, but to just be him. He knew he had people in his life who loved him for him, and that’s pretty cool.
Still, I don’t know if I ship Cirrus and Sunny 😂.
Gosh, I’m terrible. . .
Also, I just want to say I have nothing against David Yoon. I think he’s a fatnatsitc person and he’s funny—if you follow his Instagram you would know 😄. He’s a good writer with good lines, but sometimes a ship isn’t for you and that’s okay. That doesn’t mean the story was bad because it wasn’t! I just wanted to say that because David Yoon is cool, and Nicola Yoon is the coolest. They are the coolest together 👌🏼.
Anyway, what was your favorite part of the book? Least favorite part? Anything I mentioned that you want to discuss more about? What’s your favorite band? I am a ONE DIRECTIONER FOR LIFE! 😆 Where are my directioners AT? 🤪
Let me know below in the comments as I love hearing from you all 💕
I hope you have a beautiful day whenever and wherever you might be reading this 😊.
And as always, with love,
Rating
3.86 Full Bloom Flowers
Characters: Sunny’s not that bad of a person when he’s just being honest with himself. I didn’t really like his cynicism, but that came from hurt. I LOVED Jamal and Milo—such amazing friends.
Plot: I appreciated the heart of the story with what it means to be cool and faking who you are.I also enjoyed the brother and friendship dynamic
Writing: I honestly liked this David Yoon a lot more, but Sunny’s personality wasn’t really for me 🤪
Romance: I wasn’t a big fan of the Sunny and Cirrus romance because I just didn’t feel like it was real.