All Your Perfects by Colleen Hoover Book Review
“If you only shine light on your flaws, all your perfects will dim.”
About
Author: Colleen Hoover (the queen of romance) 😊
Genre: New Adult Contemporary
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Synopsis
Colleen Hoover delivers a tour de force novel about a troubled marriage and the one old forgotten promise that might be able to save it.
Quinn and Graham’s perfect love is threatened by their imperfect marriage. The memories, mistakes, and secrets that they have built up over the years are now tearing them apart. The one thing that could save them might also be the very thing that pushes their marriage beyond the point of repair.
All Your Perfects is a profound novel about a damaged couple whose potential future hinges on promises made in the past. This is a heartbreaking page-turner that asks: Can a resounding love with a perfect beginning survive a lifetime between two imperfect people?
Review
Spoilers Contained Below
Dear CoHo family,
Welcome to another book made by the queen herself. Do you ever just lie awake wondering how Colleen Hoover just writes books that you know will agonize you in the best way? I don’t but I should. At least then, I’ll be mentally prepared for what I’ll feel when I read her next novel.
I can thoroughly say that this is a book that all ages can read and appreciate. I think it’s such a profound story that woman and men can relate to or understand the topics it covers with infertility, first love, marriage, changes in yourself and your relationship, infertility, and depression. I feel like any married couple should read All Your Perfects because it really will impact your outlook on marriage or relationships in general. I know I want my future husband to read this book just for the sense of understanding that marriage and life has its challenges. Also, so if we have a category 5 storm, the love letters may help. Wouldn’t it be just cute if you had a love letter from your husband that he wrote to you a long time ago? I think that would be sweet.
I never read a book with the then and now perspectives before and I feel like writing it this way was very strategic and made the story stronger. I loved how we got to see how happy, young, and spontaneous Quinn and Graham were in the past, and then how dark, dreary, and complicated everything was seven years later. It kept making me wonder what happened or what changed in the span of seven years to make them the complicated couple they were today?
I also liked how Colleen described their avoidance as a dance where they would skirt around each others touches in private or how they would give one worded responses/clipped answers or how they avoided talking about that “something more.” They walked on eggshells around each other because some part of them still wanted to make their relationship work, but they were both starting to slowly lose hope about everything that the relationship used to be. It was no longer touches and long conversations, but not talking about their real feelings and feeling relieved when one person doesn’t touch the other. And it was kind of sad to see that distinct difference when in the past they could barely keep their hands off of each other, let alone their clothes.
But let’s talk about how Quinn and Graham met when they were both at Ethan’s door realizing that their partner at the time was cheating. Like what are the odds that that Quinn and Graham would fall in love with each other as they ere being cheated on? I thought it was comical but kind of cute that they were both at Ethan’s door listening and eating the Chinese food Ethan ordered. I was also surprised at how calm and collected Graham was in that moment. So many other guys would have ran into Ethan’s apartment in a blind rage, but he was so mature and cool about it, maybe even a bit expectant that Sasha would have cheated on him, which was kind of sad. Speaking of sad, throughout the book, Quinn always describes Graham as someone with sad eyes and frown/smile, and how that makes him beautiful, which made me wonder why he always seemed sad? But I think describing him as so was purposeful to emphasize that even though he wasn’t the most upbeat and open person, he was beautiful in other ways.
I really enjoyed the fortune cookies and the significance of their fortunes and the fate of the numbers 8/8 on the back of them to represent the day they reconnected. Graham’s fortune was “You will succeed in a great business endeavor today,” and Quinn’s was “If you only shine light on all your flaws, all your perfects will dim.” At the time, Graham—like anyone else—believed that his fortune was dumb because he didn’t go to work that day. But when looking back on it, I like how he realized that his fortune was true because if he had been at work he wouldn’t have ever met Quinn. As the story goes on and the plot built, Quinn’s fortune didn’t seem as significant until it was brought up again at the end. Because she only focused on her infertility and all the things her life lacked, she didn’t see how perfect her life already was with a husband who loved her so much. I have come to respect and love this quote so much. I think if anyone only focuses on the negative—that we don’t have this or why don’t we have that—-we become blindsided to all our “flaws’ and faults in life and that’s when “all our perfects”—food, water, family, a home, friends, love—-gets dimmed, because we don’t see it as much, when we should realize just how lucky and perfect our life really is. Sure life can be perfect with more riches and other things, but we have to appreciate and love what we have now.
But back to the story . . .
I loved their past relationship and how seamless and loving it was. I loved when they had matching Halloween costumes or when they went to the beach house and talked night about religion and politics, and Graham really went in depth about his platform. It was just all around cute. Something I really love about any romance book or show is how the characters who fall in love are able to have an effortless conversation about nothing and everything and I truly believe those are the best conversations—the ones that are free flowing.
As they grow closer, they have more fun, but Quinn wasn’t ready for a relationship at the time . So that’s why Quinn never called Graham to be her rebound guy, but she kept his Post-it by her door like she was holding onto the hope or possibility of something more. I felt like she was just really scared to call him. They really started talking agin when supposedly she gave him the “look” on her date with another guy. So Graham went to her apartment and was like I ditched my date because you gave me the “look.” Must have been some look 😏
Graham’s character also evolved during this time from someone who was enigmatic to a guy who was straightforward, honest, and slightly funny. The first night when they reconnected, Quinn wanted to do something more with him, but Graham stopped her and was like let’s talk and get to know each other first. And they talked for hours. Any guy would have just done what Quinn wanted, but I had so much respect for Graham in wanting to take things slow and talk because he was so sure they were meant for each other. During that scene, I remembered he said he would tell Quinn “I told you so” if ten years later they were still together. Then at the end he tells her “I told you so.” It was such a cute full circle moment.
During the Halloween scene, I liked how Ava dressed up as the mother and Quinn thought she was being a prude and wondered what she was supposed to be. Then Reid tells her your mother. Honestly, such a good inside joke.
Quinn’s mom was kind of hard to like because she’s very judgmental and an obvious gold digger. I don’t like how she made it such an obvious fact to her daughters that she never wanted kids. Quinn’s been trying for years to have kids and genuinely wants them, and then there’s her mother who was able to have two girls and says she never wanted kids. Quinn and Ava deserved better. The mom also packed up Quinn’s room to make it into a closet when she could have turned any other room in her big luxurious house into a closet. Turning your daughters room into your closet extension really screams volumes on how much you love her. Graham’s parents kept Grahams’ room the same all these years with his science trophies and the periodic table. Like if you love your child, you would keep their essence alive in your home in hopes they came to stay again one day. Quinn’s mom shoved out her kids and made their rooms a closet. What love.
I also just felt so bad for Quinn too because she wanted to talk to someone when Graham cheated on her, but it was hard for her to open up to her mom. I understood why. It’s hard to talk to someone who never cared much about you, but themselves more. I wanted to give Quinn a hug when she sat on the front steps of her mom’s house, too scared to go in because she would feel trapped. If that’s not heartbreaking, I don’t know what is 😿 But past Graham was so sweet about meeting the mom because he knew how nervous Quinn was. He eased her mind by saying she could blame wedding things on him because the mom’s going to hate him anyway, so might as we’ll give her a reason. Like how sweet. But the absolute best thing was when he told her how he was inspired or amazed by her in how she turned out despite growing up in a very harsh environment. That was the moment they said I love you to each other, and it was just the best moment for them to do that when they saw each other for their strengths and not their weaknesses. Get you a man or woman who can see you as you are: strong.
Something I also highly appreciated was how the past really coincided with the present in how she questioned their love and how it talked about the first time they said I love you.
The getting married at the beach part was also a good scene in how they created the category five box with their love notes that they would read on their 25th anniversary or in case of an emergency. I thought the box had a prenup at first because of how much the mom kept pushing it! Then I thought wedding photos? Vows? The string in the box from Spongebob? 😂
No love notes! That was soooo much better!
Before I get to the part that literally broke me, let’s back track to how their relationship was now difficult, aka, the present day Quinn and Graham.
I could understand Quinn in her feelings. She felt alone and like she’s a failure as a human and a wife. She felt like Graham would make a great father because they talked about having kids, but yet here she was so many years later unable to make that happen for him. And she felt like it’s her fault because Graham was healthy. Quinn just sounded so despondent in the beginning, crying in the shower and not wanting Graham’s touch. And it’s because she wanted to have kids to make Graham happy and to fix everything between them, but I kept saying to myself,” Quinn having a baby is not going to fix your relationship!” Adding a baby will make things worse because if you still have relationship problems, the baby will grow up with parents who will maybe fight all the time and things like that. That’s only going to be a tie in the relationship. Not a mend.
But the time when Quinn and Graham tried to “do it” in the beginning was so heart shattering because gosh the utter pain I felt for both of them was surreal. I could understand how Graham would be angry because he just wanted to love his wife, but then Quinn thought of “doing it” as a way to have babies. So Graham tested her and didn’t “do it” and she cries in full on tears because he didn’t give her what she wanted—a chance to try to be pregnant again. And to Graham it made him feel like she didn’t love him for love or for him, but for what he could make happen (babies) and it was just so hard to sit there and read that knowing how they were both feeling. And it’s just all messy because of all the things that were left unsaid and just UGH! The miscommunication!
If only they talked to each other about how they felt and what they were going though, it would have saved them heartbreak and me emotional turmoil. Graham really, honestly, truly loved her and waned to be there for her. He wanted her to talk to him rather than hide in the shower and cry. The fact that he knew that was just so sad because what was he supposed to do? Knock on the shower door and be like open up? He gave her space and that was nice, but there has to come a point when you have to open up to someone.
Then there was that part where he screamed in anger that he loved her—–I got literal chills. Graham was just so angry at her for not seeing that he does love her and for even questioning it.
“I love you,” he said quietly, shaking his head. “I always have. No matter how much you wish I didn’t.”
(pg 190)
Coleen Hoover, rip our my heart why don’t you?
The big shock was the when he cheated on her. You literally met Quinn when she got cheated on and here you were cheating on her with some girl in your office?!!! The disappointment set in. And what a typical guy thing to do to turn it around on her and make it her fault that he missed her and that this Andrea chick remind him of her. And it’s like, don’t try to ethically define your cheating!!!! 😤 He said he didn’t think him capable of such a thing. I guess you were. I couldn’t ever with Graham and how broken and sad Quinn was. Graham was there for her when she got cheated on and now she was alone.
When I thought things couldn’t get ANY WORSE. They got IMMENSELY WORSE.
She had a hysterectomy. Que the tears 😭 Quinn was pregnant but had a miscarriage and all she could focus on was how if she known, she could have given Graham the hope of being a father even if it was a short amount of time—she could have made him happy.
Then after this, she goes to Europe to see Ava. She hasn’t talked to Graham in three weeks and he goes to visit her where they finally open up that darn box and the dance ends.
I was literally screaming!
Then they read the letters. Graham, my heart, never read his because he didn’t need to—he was that sure of his love for her. Gosh, my heart.
What made everything so special was that not only was there the initial love letters they wrote before they got married, but the love letters Graham added whenever he felt like their love wasn’t going to survive. And in those letters he explained why he stopped asking her what did he miss while she was sleeping because he asked her once and cried. So he never wanted to ask her again until they were parents. And he kept emphasizing his love for her after each and ever one. I swear, my heart couldn’t take it! But my favorite letter was this part of the last letter:
“We haven’t lost yet, Quinn.
And no mater what has happened since we closed this box or what will happen after we open it, I promise to love you through it all.
I promise to love you more when you’re hurting than when you’re happy.
I promise to love you more when you’re poor than when we’re swimming in riches.
I promise to love you more when you’re crying than when you’re laughing.
I promise to love you more when you’re sick than when you’re health.
I promise to love you more when you hate me than when you love me.
I promise to love you more as a childless woman than I would love you as a mother.
And I promise. . . . I swear . . . that if you choose to end things between us, I will love you mores as you’re walking out the door than on the day you walked down the aisle.
I hope you choose the road that will make you the happiest. Even its it’s not a choice I’ll love. I will still always love you. Whether I’m a part of your life or not. You deserve happiness more than anyone I know.
I love you forever.
Graham
(pg 277)
Colleen Hoover literally just wrote my future vows!
I mean, everyone needs a man like Graham who can write how much they love you until the point it hurts. In his most recent letter, he mentioned how he knew Quinn was there when he held his nephew and that she must have heard him say he was devastated to not be a father yet. What he meant was he was devastated for Quinn.
Those notes were their saving grace and was everything. I was in a puddle of tears by the end of it because they haven’t lost were going to keep trying.
I loved how the next day, he asked her about her dream and she told him about the memory she had of the time she told Graham she would be happy if their future didn’t entail a big house, a nice car, or lots of kids. It was such a defining moment for their relationship knowing that kids may not be their future, but they had each other.
Quinn was now able to joke about it whenever people ask her if she had kids. I liked how it became a game between her and Graham to make up the most ridiculous story. They had all girls named after spices like Parsley, Cumin, Basil, and Rosemary 😂 Rosemary’s cute, Cumin? Not so much. I also liked how once Quinn got past realizing things would be okay without kids, she became more passionate about her dreams. She wrote a book and her and Graham spontaneously moved to Europe to be close to Ava and farther from the mom.
When Quinn finally smiled, I felt like she was finally living again. I could see how happy she was, focusing on the love in her life than the sorrow.
The epilogue was adorable in how Graham kept cheering her on like the proud husband he was when Quinn changed the tire. Or how they got a dog and named it August after the month they reconnected. And to think that that was the month they reconnected all those years ago and that it was maybe the month that they reconnected again after their hardships. Full circle moment, my friends, full circle moment.
One of my favorite quotes was how marriage isn’t perfect, but the secret s to not give up at the same time. They were going to give up, but they loved each other so much to make it work.
This book filled me with so much love, pain, and insight as to marriage. If you’re married, in a relationship, or still looking for that perfect one, I hope you never give up on each other at the same time. I hope you make it work. And if fate has it that it doesn’t work out, I hope there’s someone like Graham waiting on the other side of that closed door in your life, who can be your new door and person who will love you completely even in the storms of life.
If you read this book what was your favorite part of the book? Least favorite part? Did you have to bring out the box of tissues anywhere? What was your favorite quote. Let me know below in the comments as I love hearing from you 💕
As always, with love,
Rating
5 Full Bloom Flowers
Characters: In the beginning, it’s very hard to openly like Quinn because she’s very reserved and she’s going through a rough time. But as the book goes on, you begin to develop a deeper understanding of Quinn and see how she just has a different perspective of things. There’s also that one time I TOTALLY disliked Graham, but I learned to forgive him because he made up for it in the end. He truly came through.
Plot: Incomparable < 3
Writing: Just perfect
Romance: Utterly heart-wrenching in the best way possible